Will they send him home?

My dad is paralysed on one side. He can’t transfer himself from bed to chair or anything like that. His partner is extremely frail and sickly and and has long term ailments herself and attempted to help him with a steady Eddie but sadly could not. They are going to try the plank method next. My question is, will they send him home despite not being able to transfer?

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It is possible that they will but you need to make sure there is a care package and the right equipment in place before they do so. It maybe that a half way house might be more suitable - a rehab facility. My advice is to make it clear to the staff that his partner isn’t capable of caring for him. If you tell them you’ll manage that’s exactly what they’ll expect you to do.

If you’re in hospital and are no longer being treated medically then they try and find an alternative place for you to go to free up hospital beds.

Ask the drs at the hospital what their intentions are so you can start to make the necessary plans including ensuring everything your dad needs is in place.

Best wishes




My suggestion might be of no use, so ignore it if it doesn’t apply.

I was in hospital, in much the same condition. I was fed up with nurses who weren’t in a hurry to move me when I wanted.

I asked a physio if it would be possible to get myself on the commode and back to bed by myself. She suggested something called ‘a transfer’ which involved leaning over and taking the weight on my strong side then sliding my bottom across to where I wanted to sit. She drilled me on this a number of times until I was able to do it confidently. At this stage I was unable to stand or walk. It was very liberating being able to do that small thing.

Around the same time I was introduced to a transfer device, which got me up into standing position so I could be wheeled about from one place to another.

I was very slow to recuperate and found things difficult but if he shows willingness to try he will get help. I stress the willingness to try combined with encouragement, they are both very important.

Now 20 months after stroke I can walk to the kitchen to make myself a brew, get on and off a commode and join my wife to watch television.(Not all at the same time, I hasten to add.) I also use this laptop to send messages on the forum and take part in Zoom sessions.

Although limited there is life of a sort and I have a continued belief in improvement over time.

Take care and stay bright, there is good reason for hope.

On a negative note, a doctor told me. after a fall, that improvement will be marked by ending up on the floor sometimes. Having had my share of falls I can only say that it has brought me now to a state where I can stand and walk unaided. It was all worth it.

Keep on keepin’ on
:writing_hand: :grinning: :+1:

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Hi @Del2
we can’t predict what you’re local authorities bed pressures and release policies are - but what we can suggest has been partly covered by Mrs 5K and Bobby.
My experience was out the door as soon as I could get to the loo on my own - albeit the very slowly! BUT not before

I would stress bobby’s “motivation and assistance” can work wonders :slight_smile: when you add a little time - perseverance :frowning: The weight transfer and slide your bum from bed to chair etc technique & back is well worth him/them learning how to coordinate

I would suggest useful places to make contact might be your local council’s adult social care service, they should be able to advise about ‘support in the community’ services that they have statutory obligation to deliver. The occupational therapist on the ward should be plugged into that process too so it would be wise to at least make contact there too

The hospital to home transition appears to be a weak spot in most authorities. Many people have reported that by insisting on help and support they get more than accepting what they were told right at the start - that’s obviously a balancing act of personalities and practicalities

Places to ask specifically for advice would be the stroke association helpline - You can look on their website but there’s so much that often it’s hidden in plain sight. If you’re browsing this forum from a web browser (not the mobile app) then the “purple?” Is a place to start searching

ageUK is another souce of help - they also run the silverline befriending service.

Citizens advice bureau Also operate locally and nationally you can find your local contact on their website - they have a very good reputation for knowing how to deal with the red tape needed for benefits and services


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