I have never been one to not be able to shake depression but I go to sleep feeling hopeless and wake up and I am the same or mad because I can’t sleep anymore.I used to be gung ho about physical therapy now I just don’t care about it.I feel like I can’t get a handle on anything.I talk to my boyfriend about things and he cheers me up but he can only do so much until I get out of the nursing home I am in because he is two hours away from me and has no transportation.I can’t leave until my disability gets approved because I don’t have money and can’t get a job.I have a dog that is also two hours away and I miss her so much but I can’t have her even though it says online I an staying at a pet friendly nursing home.I’m sorry to write something so depressing but I don’t know what else to do.Thanks for listening
Your healing and recovery will be using up an awful lot of energy and nutrients in your body. Depletion of vital vitamins and minerals can lead to anxiety and depression. Maybe you just need a vitamin boost. Multivitamin tablets or a daily nutrient shake like Complan be just the boost you need to work your way out of this funk you are in.
The pet friendly I think may just be referring to visiting pets, not to remain in residence with their owners, like yourself.
Realistically speaking, the burden of care would be on the nursing staff’s shoulders for residents pets. Because not all the residents, yourself included, would be in any fit state to care for their own pet. Practically speaking the care staff have a hundred and one other things to do for their residents rehabilitation.
Then there is also the health and safety aspect to be considered 
The sooner you are up and walking, that faster you can run home!
Look at this way. You can stand! Now take a few steps forward with your therapist. Then a few more. The brain can’t retrain if you don’t think about what you want it to do. That’s what this physiotherapy is all about and the sooner you get with the programme the sooner you are going to be back home.
You need to be concentrating on getting your legs working again and that’s what you should be using up all your energy on, not maudlin about. All that is going to get you is a coffin if you don’t start giving yourself a verbal kick up the butt every now and then to stay focused on a future with 2 working legs to take you there.
While you wile away your time focusing on nothing other than all the negative aspects of your stroke, you are in fact holding yourself back. When, what you should actually be doing is focusing all your energy on your recovery. Your level of recovery depends on your level of determination and lots of physio exercising, are you up for that?
As I asked someone else earlier, are you a glass half full or a glass half empty kind of person? Is it your attitude and mindset to this stroke that’s holding you back? Is that what’s going to let your body down?
Negativity is not what it needs right now.
A positive mindset brings out more positive responses from your body.
Stop drip feeding yourself negativity, that’s just mental abuse 
Are you for that or against it?
Sorry to hear your still feeling a little low and not seeing your pooch is just another thing to lower your mood and i know its hard.
I do agree with emerald eyes about positive reinforcement to help with the recovery as its hard enough on the realisation of " oh my god i have had a stroke whats next".
When i couldn’t use my left hand properly as my hand to eye decided go on holiday without each other abd i found it hard. On a funnier note you could be stood in the kitchen shouting at your left hand to pick up that f’in tin of beans for
a month… 
I made myself do it because if i didnt the tin of beans would of won and then i would of got someone open the tin and ate them…
Thanks for not being easy on me.It’s what I needed to feel normal.
Theres being easy or being 100% honest I would prefer honesty any day.
What really is Normal as your still a person and you have people around you who love you “don’t forget this” how can i try to put this all of us stroke victims/suviviors are Normal people who had something we didn’t see coming.
It’s how people dancing around us that does make us feel like we are not normal and thats the bit that makes us feel we are not. But all we would like in the end is to be treated like a person a normal person.
Like when i had my stroke my youngest daughter was very clingy and always asking me am i alright and do i need anything all the time. It got to the point where i told her “yes hunny i am ok can you please stop as you are not going out to see your friends and your stuck next to me like glue” i get she was upset and knew something bad happened to her dad… but my daughter putting her life on hold a little was not normal and this is what makes us feel we are not i said to her " if i need something i will ask as i have you and your mum so please go out" she smiled and toddled of and went out play with her friends… Thats Normal…
Good! That’s what we are aiming for here. There’s really no need to be tiptoeing around and offering you tea and sympathy because that’s only feeding your negativity and depression. I can give you that all you want but that won’t sit well on my conscience, because that is doing you no favours. I can’t help you with the physical things but I can help keep you grounded and in the here and now.
And I want to cheer you on but I can only do that when you start writing about the things you are doing, the positives, the physio you are getting, the progress you are making that all helps in getting you home. And I definitely want to pics of your beagle Maddie. Can you do that for all of us, because we all need to see the progresses we all make, big or small, it what spurs us all on and feeds all our hopes for the future. It’s what spurs us all on not just you and me 
The evenings are getting lighter now which always lifts my mood. Hopefully we’ll get some better weather. Can you get outside? Some sunshine and fresh air should lift your mood. Do you have anyone helping you to claim benefits? That’s very hard if you’ve never done it before.
Janet
I do have someone here at the home who is in charge of claiming my benefits I am just waiting for a decision.@EmeraldEyes as far as my progress I have definitely made some I could not stand when I got here.I remember my second day here I felt like I always had that is in my mind when I was sitting on the bed.So I stood up and tried to take off walking to the hall and my balance was gone so I just fell in a heap It seemed so loud and I think that is when I finally realized how huge this change was.I was afraid of falling and kinda everything for a while but now I can stand for over two minutes without anyone holding me up and I used to need someone on each side of me just to get from my chair to the bed and now I can transfer from one to the other alone.Also pictures of my Maddie to come
Satchley1 hi there,
your post speaks to me. Like you,
i needed a lift. I was miserable in rehab…
home was just as rough the first 2-3 months.
In January I could hardly sleep at all
What I want to say is that one day things will be better
Hang on until then… then keep on improving.
That’s where I am… I’ve turned a corner and am on my way up
wishing you strength and faith
ciao, Roland
How’s Maddie at chasing cats
Oh good lord, we don’t want you doing that again 
I may not have said as much, but when I suggested taking a few steps forward, I had in mind you trying it with your physio on hand No one expects you to run before you can walk But keep testing your abilities every day…with your physio…we don’t want you landing in any more heaps…and keep on pushing for those break throughs. They will come and you will turn your corner!
Remember, you keep your mind focused on the prize, don’t allow yourself to knock you back or drag you down, and I’m looking forward to the pics 
@EmeraldEyes lol Maddie is excellent at chasing everything.She is a beagle they are notorious hunting dogs
Oh she looks gorgeous and very regal looking in that third photo 
My mum’s last dogs was a pint sized ball of fluff called Giblet. He was a with Maltese (and not a terrier as everyone likes to tag on to the end 
) and they are notorious for honing in on crackly bags of treats
So who plays the guitars in your house 
And how are you feeling today
It’s hard to know what to say in response to your original post, except that I too am depressed on a regular basis, especially when I think what I could do before my stroke and what I can do now.
Don’t worry about the feelings, we all had them and they are normal I am now nearly 13 months on from my stroke (only spent 5 weeks in hospital), I still get depressed but not as often.
Its very hard to cope when you are not at home but that day will come.
@EmeraldEyes I am doing pretty good today.I have heard troubling news about my dog because she may not have anywhere to stay but I am trying to figure something out.Besides that I am more focused on my PT and we are concentrating on walking so fingers crossed
Oh, that is so much good news Satchley, here’s hoping you’ve come out of your funk for while I like the fact you are now working on trying to walk as that is the most important part for you getting around and caring for yourself and Maddie.
In truth, I wouldn’t mind missing an arm as opposed to remaining in a wheelchair. Life could be more challenging for you and limiting too. So you work as hard as you can with the walking, good things will come of it I’m sure, stay positive and stay focus on that prize
Don’t know what to suggest for Maddie; can’t your boyfriend keep her for a time to give your friend a break?
On the PT front a little tip, keep things moving a little when you are sitting between meals/naps/pt. Be regularly testing your capabilities, for example when sitting have a go at sliding your stroke leg forward and back and alternate with the good leg to remind it how it moves and feels to move.
There are lots of little seated exercises in this youtube link that you could be doing in your down time…if you haven’t already got plenty from your therapists
https://www.youtube.com/@PostStrokeOrg/featured
There’s also lots of good brain training apps you might be able to download to exercise the old grey matter, keep yourself sharp and focused.
A bit of variety in those areas helps keep you interested so you don’t lose momentum.
Morning,
So sorry your feeling this way, but clearly looking to move forward as youve reached out to write.
Keep trying to focos on getting back to your Fur baby & Partner,give yourself possitive thoughts.
I myself set 4 steps of improvement to work at,little things like, today im going to smile a lot today ( silly i know) but it worked.
Keep going you will get there.
Bev 
I have hard falling sleep with no medicine and with other issues