Hi Folks
Today is the anniversary of my wife death.
Had two previous attempts tp post, but the posts were too dark lets say.
Some shots as a teenager-Then mid 20s on a float in mayors parade. She loved parades and dressing the kids up in fancy dress.So much so the kids won fancy dress every year.
Mid 40s at a friends wedding and then late 50s at one of our daughters weddings.
one in her 60s holding baby Harlen.Grandson Harlen and June never met in life but by the magic of AI daughter had a pic of then produced.
Hopefully they are together now.
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Feel it for you Gavel…grief is a strange beastie…I sometimes wonder if it does “get better with time” but I guess that just means an ability to function with it alongside you. No reason to seek a solution for grief, remembering is part of it and can be comforting (after a good greet, as they say here in Scotland). Keep your love for her held tight xx
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thank you
To be honest i feel the same grief today as the day i walked out of that hospital alone.
I found this pic in her private things after she died. Kind of shows what a loyal person she was.
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I imagine grief pops in at various times everyday. Thanks for sharing a part of your history together.
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yes simple things can trigger grief. Good memories can help reduce it.
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forgot to post pic of her plot.Looks good.Familly have been visiting today.
We are trying to get Harlens ashes beside her.
My resting place with her is paid for, but to quote gladiator "not yet, Not yet "
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My Len was a bit of a revolutionary atheist and didn’t want a grave….he kept saying just throw me in the river. I kept his ashes on my bookshelf for seven years but then thought no one will know about his wishes, so I took him to the river and tossed him in….out of nowhere a breeze blew up and covered me and Mary and Watson (my two dogs) with the ashes… I just had to laugh, the auld b***** was still at it!!! I can go to the river’s bank when I feel the need so don’t regret putting him in . I do miss his cherry red Dr Martens that I gave away to a convoy going to a refugee camp thinking he would like to see them on the feet of someone who would benefit….i used to like looking at them in the corner….like say, grief is a strange thang xx hope you bearing along xx
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Hope you can use today to look back on all the good times you shared & enjoy the many happy years you had together. Grief is a difficult thing and will rear its head when you least expect it. Well that’s my experience at least.
Beautiful photos of beautiful memories. Xx
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Sorry to hear of your loss.
Len sounds like a lot of fun.
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Thank you, my lady had her moments.
Yes i agree, grief raises its ugly head when least expected.Really hard at first.
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Hi Gravel,
Heartbreaking i lost my wife 8.5 years ago. Today is a special day i know theres nothing I can say. People have written about hiw life may progress personally if I could only have my wife back I’d give up everything I have for that. You will know what I mean.
Way I look at things is like a new chapter. None of it would make sense without all the previous chapters. Thats helped me move to a different space - not the one I planned or wanted but I have a new close family (like im their uncle) in addition to the one i had with Janet it’s no less than I’d want for my Janet if our places were swapped. But I still look back i cant lie Janet was special she was the one.
Anyway enough sorry for the ramble I hope you can get the gist of it. Have a nice quiet evening friend…..
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Thank you.
So sorry to hear you are in the same situation.
I think its hard trying to convince ourseleves its worth getting up in a morning some times.
Dont know if you are the same but night time is when i feel it most.Times we would spend watching a movie together or even just chatting about life in general.
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Yes, it’s all about the one who totally “gets you” that is missed so much, the shared experiences and memories etc….i also think stroke brings a kind of grief for ones “lost” life, certainly has parallels….and yet our spirits keep on keeping on as our late partners would expect of us xx
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Hi again Gravel,
I very much used to be like that. It’s nearly 9 years now so not as raw tho sometimes it covers me like a wave. We have both been very lucky we have known a closeness with our wives that some never get to experience. Thats special too.
My life is good now it has its ups and downs yes I’d take the old life this second no question but thats not going to happen. So this new chapter it’s good - not as good but good - but in a very different way.
My “niece” I met on a bereavement website (Sue rider) and we became good friends sharing our sadness. Her kids brought me back to life i did all the ridiculous things like theme parks probably about the oldest on the rides but i didnt (& dont) give a monkeys. I wish Janet was here to share it all.
Also so I remember the no point in getting up i still get a bit of that sometimes but fair to say not like I did.
Im sorry to go on I hope some of this is of interest or better- help. Stroke has made me quite determined to make the best of every day for sure if Janet was here and me not thats what I’d want her to do.
Better finish there - anniversaries are really tough so I hope u r remembering all the good times you had with your wife. Memories so precious.
Keep well friend…
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I’m probably not alone.
Dealing with grief, one’s own, or of another is never easy.
I’ve not got a simple, easy or correct response to this post.
I can’t pass it by without posting a recognition to each and every one who has written here.
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I’m sorry to learn of your loss Gravel, but you will hopefully have some wonderful memories to look back on and many happy moments to hold close. She lives on in your heart so hold onto that and the knowledge that she loved you. It looks from your photos you spent many happy years together and they’re great times to remember.
I also hope you are recovering well every day. Make one of your lovely pyrography pictures for her 
. Take care
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Thank you for your kind replies folks.
Not feeling too chipper at present. Maybe its the heat and the occasion.
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Hi Gravel,
THAT’S A VERY SAD START TO THE WEEK, and I send my condolences; I regret there’s nothing more I can say that will help you through such a difficult time.
Regards
Bob Isle.
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Hope you feeling a wee bit better today Gravel, just keep going xx one day at a time.
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Thank you.
Would have been wedding anniversary tomorrow.I will bounce back once this week is over.
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