I’m sat typeing this through tears had my stroke in June and thought by now things would be getting better my stroke was a pretty big one with 4 off shots every day a struggle and a learning day I get that I’m struggling to find my identity I don’t know who I am due to all memory been lost I’m copeing with that what I carnt cope with is the pain on my left side of chest doctor o it mite be kidney infection or chest infection that was 4 weeks ago been back changed pain relief swhich caused me to swell back again I go o it could be shingles if I get a rash been awake nearly all week with pain goes back to doctor gave me pain patches n now thinks it nerve damage from stoke pain patches not workin so doubled morphine patch so I’m thinkin great mite get some relief goes back to doctors yesterday in agony only for her to send me for X-ray n give me oral morphine on top of patches n an everything thing else I’m so fed up with everything if I’d not got my two girls I don’t no what I’d do 


hi, sorry you're having a bad day, i don't really know how to help, just hope you will get better soon.

Thanks just so fed up 

Hi Lyndsay - sorry you've had such a horrible day.  Every stroke survivor will recognise what you have been experiencing - you are not alone.  The only positive thing is ... this will pass, you will feel better as time passes.  It's really difficult living through the scary days, but there will also be plenty of good days.  Your brain may be telling you that you need some rest - don't be too harsh on yourself.

Take care xx


I just seem to have more bad days than good and certain people say n telling me I should be feeling better and I should try and do more well I would but my brain don't work like my body wants it to I feel like I'm a burden to every1 as I need babysitting all time immust on a real downer as if lost my independence and everything I do try n do I get shouted 

Hi Lyndsay, you really are having a bad time, I think I would ring your stroke consultants secretary at the hospital and ask if you could have an appointment at the stroke clinic.  This may help as they are the specialist in stroke.  Hope things improve. Also try to get hold of your local Stroke Association coordinator, you can get that by ringing your local hospital.  They can help or call the Stroke Association national helpline. Good luck. Wendy

Lyndsay, it really sounds as though you need some support and maybe counselling.  You have been through a traumatic brain injury, and brains don't repair as quickly as broken bones - they're very delicate and extremely complicated.  There's no timeline for recovery from stroke - every one is unique, you will not know how you have recovered until you've come out of the other side, this may take months.  My suggestion would be to seek professional help, from a specialist in stroke rehabilitation.  I'm not sure who you approach to begin this process, quite possibly your GP, if you no longer have contact with your stroke discharge team.  There are others on this site who could give you more specific guidance and hopefully put you on the right track.

Best wishes

I don't even know who my stroke consultant is it's like I had my stroke had the 12 weeks with ot this one lady came to see me but only because of my age her words not mine I just feel I don't know which way to turn 

I just want the old me back but I carnt even remember me or my children or husband carnt remember anything only what's happening now n then I mite forget it's a very lonely scary place for us all to be in 

You have been set adrift - this is very serious as you don't have a point of contact.  We had to really fight to get a consultant's appointment, my husband was becoming very depressed and one day I just phoned the stroke discharge team, in floods of tears, and badgered them until I secured an appointment.  I think someone else has also advised you, the Stroke Team on this site would be able to help you navigate the system, if not I think your GP should be helping you, as they will need to make the referral.  Don't give up, stroke services are not great in some areas - keep fighting.

Only ot  helped us thanks if got gp in morning 

Stay calm but be persistant - take someone with you.

Best of luck

I’m trying to stay calm just want the pain to stop 

i'm no stranger to pain, i know how devestating persistent pain can be, it must be really bad if morphine doesn't even help.

but even when i couldn't sleep for 2 weeks because of unrelenting intense pain eventually it got sorted, don't do anything rash and stick in there.

Hi Lindsay, 

I get how you are feeling. Total and utter fed upness. I have had a bad day and have spent a huge chunk of it in tears. I went out today to get myself out the house, and went to buy a few baby gifts. It took me double if not triple the time it used to take and instead of seeing it as a positive that I am able to do this on my own. I just felt it reminded me of the loss you experience as a stroke survivor. I keep being told to remember that it was only August that this happened to me and be patient, but the aches and pains get you down and hence the tears and snotters!

I have been lucky with my follow up and am at the stage that everybody is discharging me from their care....fine by me, but they have all said, including the stroke consultant , to phone if I need them. I would in your shoes, speak to the GP and ask for them to re refer you. Remember GP’s are not experts on the stroke front but you have the right to ask for a 2nd opinion and that’s what you need to hang in there for. Remember, like I have had to remind myself today, it gets better, even when the bad days all seem to follow one another for a while. 

Good luck for your appointment tomorrow, and ask for the 2nd opinion from an expert, ie. the stroke consultant.

Take care,

Lorna ?

Hi Lindsay, 

If you're seeing a doctor or other health care professional ask them to check some routine blood tests. Sometimes low vitamin D levels and thyroid hormone levels being out of kilter and add to our woes.

Like you I have had days when all I could do is cry. As the others have said it does get better.  But as you know already takes a lot of hard work and time . No short cuts for us. Hang in there I hope you will feel better soon  



Hi Lorna, 

I had my stroke in March of this year.  And although I go out to the gym and to clinic appointments I am yet to go shopping. 

So in my humble opinion I realise to you everything took ages and loads of effort. It's fantastic that you were able to achieve your goals.  Have a well earned rest and celebrate the achievements ?‍♂️?‍♀️?‍♂️

Kind regards


Dear Lyndsay

Many of us take years in recovery, not just months. Other people just can undersatnd what you are going through. If you had your leg amputatted then you would get loads of help and understanding. But your damage is inside your brain and no one can see it, so they dont understand.

I promise you that things will improve. At three months,at six months and at nine months you will appreciate how much has eased. What you should do is rest, not try to do more. The emotionality will ease. The pains will ease. The memory will settle down. At the moment you are bombarded with unwellness. As things ease you will pick off each problem and you will then come out as a new different person. Regret that you will not be the same person as pre stroke. Therapy, medication, and so on will help bit by bit. Many of us get chest pains (very much like a heart attack) and breathing pains and I dont have any explanation why this happens.

Do smile a lot. Be positive. Dont get beaten down. You have survived and thats the greatest thing you could have done, you have come through the wretched stroke and you now have a chance of a new life. Join us on the journey of recovery. You can do it Lindsay, you can do it.


Hi Kay,

I know you are right. Just wallowing in it all! Thanks for your positivity.


Hi Lorna, 

A small wallow is allowed.  That's the benefit of this site there's always someone to call time on excessive wallowing. Then share a positive perspective until we can refocus. 

As they say  tomorrow is a new day! Hooray!