Hi Nocola, so sorry for your mother and you having to come on here. This is great place for seeking advice and tips for coping. I’m sure others will be along tomorrow if not tonight
I myself am a stroke survivor, had it just over 2 years ago. It has took me a long time get back into sleeping and the reasons I think it took me so long was the worry and stress of not sleeping. After the first few months I gave myself a good talking to.
I’m retired so I’m not on any kind of time schedule, what difference is it going to make for me if I go to sleep by a certain time and wake up at a certain time. I am my own boss and the other 3 of my family can fend for themselves. So sit down, just close your eyes and do nothing for an hour. If I’m still awake an hour later then I’d watch tv, read, have a go at washing up, do physio activities then try again in another hour. You see, I’ve lost all sense of being tired.
And so this went on for many months and gradually I’d sleep and sleep for longer periods. You see, I’ve lost all sense of being tired. The only way to know I’d even be tired enough to sleep was when I’d wake up, because I had and still have no sense of being tired. But I do recognise a sign now for when I’m tired; I get this sort of pressure in my head and I just to stop whatever I’m doing, even if it’s just watching tv, and sit and close my eyes for an hour…that is if it’s not my que to go to bed for a good nights sleep.
I have a sleep pattern now and it took almost a year to get it, 2am to 10am and I can’t seem to fix it better that…for the time being
The funny thing is, no amount of exertion in the day could induce sleep either. Even when I started walking a couple hours each day, took back most household chores and driving. Not until I started recognising my brains new method of signalling I need to go into sleep mode now
I don’t know if any of that might help you but I think you need to relax into it. It is what it is. The brain, I’ve found out, works at its own unique pace and can’t be rushed as I’m sure we’ve all tried and failed to do.
Stroke survivors are like new born babies in many ways in the beginning. I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase of babies ‘…not a good sleeper’ They need lots of sleep, awake in odd hours, sleep when you don’t want them to, along with the frequent all nighters, and you will be continually adjusting and re-establishing to new sleep patterns until eventually they go through night.
And now my brain is telling me I’ve written too much and need to rest again I do hope all that alleviates you somewhat. It will get better given time