Self pity

Feeling sorry for myself
Managed to rack up 4 miles and 237 calories while watching magnum PI
I should have been quite upbeat but not today I have tried so much and have had some success and a few setback s.

Came over all tearful and full of self pity, as I am not getting back to basics in mobility.on my weak left side, realise my wife enjoys the Tim away from me which she needs, such contrast to our courting days, how I wish I could turn back time, not happy as I am and patience has never been my strong traits,need to get some more resolve I guess

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@mrfrederickson sorry to hear you’re feeling a bit down. We all get those times don’t beat yourself up for feeling like that.

You are making great progress with your cycling & you should be proud of that.

I suspect you’re feeling it a bit as you’re used to your wife being there all the time. Having some time apart will make the time you spend together all the better I’m sure.

Are you getting any help with improving your deficits? Is it worth seeing if you can get some physio etc?

The Internet is a good source of advice too. I used it to find exercises to help me when I felt like I was getting nowhere.

Sometimes we’d all like to turn the clock.back but we can’t and we have to find a way to make the most of what we have now.

Stay strong. You’re doing great.

I am feeling a bit useless having moved from being a fit head of th family working earning and leading to a part blind crippled ma who struggles to walk to the toilet these days, I have a few physiotherapist targets to improve gait and posture, tomorrow is another day thank God

Yes the self pity and emotional melt downs still visit me now and again. Have come to terms with being by myself most of time, encourage my wife to go out when she can. Stroke is a double whammy and I’m grateful we’ve worked it out. And veteran SS at my stroke group assure me all the time there are improvements even if we fail to see them.
In the words of Beatles song ‘ we can work it out’ And work it out we will :+1:

It’s a difficult adjustment but I’m sure you’re still very useful & your wife would rather have you as you are than not at all.

Hopefully you’ll feel better tomorrow.

Thanks a good night sleep will help me re-focus,

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mrfrederickson-- I don’t know why you feel sorry for yourself. 4 miles!!! You’re a Superhero! Keep it up. Tomorrow will look brighter.image


Mr F. We all get those days, but it’s no use giving in to them. When I came home I made sure my partner had time away from me. I also got ‘toughlive’. If I started a bout of self pity I got told to snap out of it. Being told that might not suit everybody it suits me. I miss my country walks, but remind myself the best walks were taken many years ago. My mantra is ‘never give up, never give in’. I enjoy what I can and do the best I can. That’s all I can do.

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Well said and so true.

I read an article in the telegraph about a Oxford university research project looking in to blood pressure at night and they confirmed some people have the highest pressure at night which flies in the face of current know ledge.
This makes a large number of people who miss screening check ups like me and have issues in the middle of a night out sleep.All very interesting :thinking: sadly it was how it happened for me but at least I know why and check pressure at night.

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On BP looking back I was a twit ! My Mum had bad stroke aged 80, due to HBP I as a fit bomb proof 50 year old, never had any Illness so never went for check ups was a regular blood doner and assumed when they pumped away they were checking my BP, no ! they were looking for vien to stick needle in :thinking:. Aged 72 smitten, very high BP. Find out then my younger sisters had all been on BP medication for years Oooops. Bought my two sons BP monitors.

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Hi don’t beat yourself up. All most two years on from my stroke I still have days like that

The worse thing is counting up all the stroke has robbed me of so very little of the life I had left and very little hope of getting a point wher it is within my grasp, feel gutted and robbed of my life as it was the new era is just a constant reminder of what I cannot do and how much has gone At least I am better than a year ago, and stand a slim chance of recovering some of the joy I had in life, fingers crossed

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Hi @mrfrederickson
I just wanted to reach out and give you a hug. I’m sure you will continue to improve as hopefully we all shall. I think of you as a stalwart of this forum and always read your posts with enthusiasm.:pray:


Thanks for your kind words I am in a better place now watching all creatures great and small, always cheers me up, I recommend it


It can be hard but life goes on yes u are different but you are special stroke or no stroke keep going thing might well be better . We all have good and not so good days with kind regards des

Thanks Des today is slightly better than yesterday always closer to where I want to be in my recovery inch by inch Day byday always going forward did 4 miles yesterday on the exercise bike may get to break my record this week who knows, that illusive job may be round the corner, never ful Always changing, that’s life

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Yes the kitchen refit will be nearing completion, my dear wife will be living in less chaos bless her will be happy when I can contribute to the family again and be more useful

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