Hi everyone, first time I’ve felt the need to check in for a while. Today I felt I’d absolutely no energy but I pushed myself to keep going and did Sunday lunch for hubby and daughter and family, I wrote a birthday card for my sister in law but got distracted before putting it in the envelope, when I went back to it some of the words were jumbled letters 
I re did the words so as not to appear bonkers and carried on with dinner. When we sat down my daughter who is an icu nurse put her hand on my arm and said is it too hectic mum? I asked why and she said cos you look like a rabbit in headlights and you’re not getting involved in the conversation. My grandsons are 2 & 4 so they can be noisey but I love that chaos and im now 4 years post stroke. I do have mild expressive aphasia exaggerated when I’m tired but this was like returning to the early days. I heard things coming out of their mouths but it was like another language, when I asked them to repeat I realised I hadn’t just missed what they said but completely didn’t understand what they said so I smiled and said mmm. My daughter said come on grandmas tired let’s get home I hate that im 52 I shouldn’t be tired or not capable. This issue has not happened for so long and now it’s worried me. Does anyone else have a recurring issue is it normal?
Thanks Nat
I run Zoom sessions regularly.
They are quiet affairs attended occasionally by one or two people.
I am not a therapist or someone skilled in dealing with stroke but I am experienced having been struck myself about 20 months ago.
I have had a number of people come to my meetings, some have had confidence issues, aphasia and others simply wanted a face to face chat .
I think an opportunity to meet in this way with someone in a similar position can help.
I do this as an unpaid volunteer in the hope it is useful to the community here.
You could try a one to one session.
A friend or family member can be there with you, if you want.
A meeting lasts about 40 minutes, but you can cut it short if you have had enough.
Think about it and let me know here on this thread if you are interested so we can arrange a day and time.
You will not be obliged in any way.
This is not boot camp, I promise to be gentle with you.
I hope your problems resolve themselves soon,
all the best and . . .
Keep on keepin’ on
small addition
It’s also occurred to me since writing this that I could post a similar thread, offering this Zoom session to anyone else who might be interested, in the Aphasia category of the MyStrokeGuide forum.
Hi @nataliemoxham i think its common. i am 2 .5 yrs post stroke, and if too much going on my brain switches survivor mode and blocks out everything going on around me, i generally leave or go quiet.
don’t beat yourself up on it
Hi nataliemoxham, sorry to hear the issues you are having, I am three years post first stroke and a year since my second I too often get brain overload and just zone out and shut down I stop taking part or hearing people, I thought it was just me. My children are little so there is lots going on always and sometimes it’s a lot to take in I am sure things will start to settle soon and I see it as building up a level of tolerance to it all. have you tried saying I need 5 mins to myself just to gather yourself together again? Wishing you all the best x
@Elle1 @chris67 thank you, thought it was just me @Bobbi will definitely think about the zoom meeting it has definitely made me feel better in myself to know others get in the same situation I just think obviously wrongly I’m 4 years post stroke I should only be improving not regressing.
Nataliemoxham, it can be difficult I know when you want the world to stop to give you a bit of time to recover and then you can go again but unfortunately this can’t always happen and I see it as pushing forwards to the next level, that thinking helps me, be gentle with yourself though don’t push yourself too much, I think you have to know when you’re brains had enough, and needs to restX
@nataliemoxham it could well be that you’ve over done it & if so it should settle & normal service will be resumed. If it doesn’t settle a chat with your GP might be needed. I think it is normal though to suffer some affects for many years after a stroke. They just pop up from time to time to remind us we had the stroke.
Beat wishes
Ann
Ditto what everyone else said. I am 5 years post stroke. When I feel good I tend to do too much. Then for a day or two I feel almost as yucky as I did 4 years ago. Where did all that progress go?!! I have to learn to “pace” myself better and not overdo- more resting. Guess I have to “baby” my brain a little. It’s been injured and yet tries to carry on valiantly , until it just needs to turn off and recoup. 
Jeanne
Makes sense really I have upped my exercise massively in the last two months, proud of myself for cycling 60 miles last week in 3 days. Maybe got a bit cocky I’ve chilled all day today but still can’t hold a conversation without seeming rude and uninterested.
We had a bit of a family sports day yesterday. During a game of rounders, I was waiting on 3rd base for quite a while as the 7yr old bowler was having some issues with a 70 something batter who didn’t know how to hold the bat…that’s adults for you 
…but he was a very patient bowler and a good teacher 
Suddenly the ball came flying straight to me so I caught it and tapped the base…completely forgetting that I was the one who was supposed to be running 
I think I must have just zoned out during the antics 
I find such games that come with a lot of hilarity, chaos and confusion, I can partake in so much then bit by bit I start to shut down as I tire. By evening I listen more than I converse and speech does start to slur more. One effect of my aphasia is that my voice fades as I tire.
It’s 2½yrs since my stroke and have just mild aphasia now but I still get these episodes from time to time so it’s nothing out of the ordinary for me yet.
However you say this is a “Recurring problem after so long”, personally I would at least call 111 and get their advice, take it from there basically. It will at least give you peace of mind.
You probably already considered this but it might be useful to you to keep a diary of activity and fatigue levels and how they manifest and the might be some patterns that you would be informed of and therefore be able to avoid .
Certainly rest assured that all the symptoms you describe are reasonably traceable back to having a smaller brain battery than you did in the past and by using it up faster than you did in the past 
it just needs recharging more often like an aging mobile phone
Shwmae Nat, I am reticent to express what is normal post-stroke, as one should be wary of acquired conditions, whether they be associated with stroke or completely unrelated. I am three years post stroke, and have regressive days. These, I put down to being run down, or a result of underlying anxiety. Sometimes, if I become anxious of a feeling, and put that anxiety aside, and try and be pragmatic, I find that the wheels of that anxiety keep on spinning in the back of my mind and can provide me with a day of recurrent symptoms.
It’s a tricky one. After stroke I noticed that I had more grey hairs, but did these occur because of the stress, or because I was actually aging, or had I just been paying more attention to my appearance?
@Rups I think it’s all relevant if I’m being honest I’m waiting for surgery next month, nothing major in the world of normal but an icu bed will be waiting for me due to my congenital heart condition which is the reason I had the stroke in the first place and directly after a small surgery. I hate seeing family stress about me so I deal with it by smiling saying it will be fine and firmly putting my head back in the sand. I did speak with my husband last night and he said it’s nothing new this, you are like this if you over stretch yourself you’re just more aware of it right now. You’re trying to be everything to everyone. Out of the two things I have been “blessed” with stroke is firmly at the top of the list for the worst most unpredictable pain in the ass 
. I feel like I’ve had a right good moan now and thank you and thank god I’m from Yorkshire i have an excuse to drop words in sentences and blame it on my heritage
Please moan away - make it as cathartic as you need and let that Yorkshire accent come through your written words :). The accent may cheer the rest of us up and will sympathise with the content of the moan (and it might even legitimise our moaning when we need to)
Time for a brew?
Simon when is it not time for a brew
After the sun Crosses the yard arm?
As the years go by these bouts of tiredness and switching off get less frequent.
Even now,almost 14 years from my stroke,I find that it is better to do things in short sessions and take frequent periods of rest,rather than overdo it and become tired.
You need to get used to the new you and pace things accordingly.
Wonderful to have children and grandchildren visit, contact with friends and family is very beneficial to your recovery,but they also need to watch out for you,as your daughter seems to have done.
Good luck on your journey
Tony
Hello, I completely understand your situation, it’s only been nine months since my stroke, while physically I look like I’ve recovered 100% to others I know myself I can’t do as much as I used to. With regards to where you stated conversation I get that quite often it’s like brain fog, the words aren’t all registering and can’t think of the words to say and sometimes the wrong words come out making me look like a pillock, but as you know that’s a sure sign of the chronic fatigue we’ve been cursed with. It’s quite difficult in work because as the day goes on your getting more fatigued and I’m trying my best to mask it till I get home. I’m only 38, so you needn’t worry about your age I understand the frustration totally, fingers 
things will get better for us both
@Jayman exactly right, you’re still in the early recovery stages so I hope you keep on improving dramatically and work gets easier. I gave up working in 2020 after reducing my hours but still struggling with fatigue, I walked through the door and I was asleep before tea and didn’t have the energy for anything or anybody. After many discussions and as retirement at 55 wasn’t too far away we decided on me giving up work sooner so I could enjoy my grandkids, go to the gym to improve my strength which the stroke association arranged a membership at half the price. I Cannot imagine this happening at your young age. I struggle with balance and walking but I can cycle really well so I look like two different people . I’m with you on looking like a pillock I know when I’m drifting i tend to do a lot of smiling rather than talking because it’s either utter rubbish coming out or inappropriate replies.
Fingers x we keep on improving
Nat
Hi Nat.
I’ve just been reading everyone’s comments and can identify with a lot of what is being said. I have mild aphasia following my stroke 12 months ago. I also try and carry on as ‘normal’ but it does become overwhelming at times and that’s when I know I have to slow down and rest.
Think we have to accept we’ve had a big setback and be kind to ourselves.
All the best
Cynthia
Ps I struggled finding the word ‘identify’ but got there! 