So sorry to hear that. Condolences to you, your wife & the family. 
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Thanks Ann the hard work ow begins sadly but it was inevitable.
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Mark - Sorry for your loss. Sincere condolences to you and your family.
May your father-in-law rest in peace
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Thank you so much for all the info, Roland!
I bought the DNM book on Kindle and hoping I’ll learn from it.
The Rolfing sounds very interesting. I’ve not got any further with it yet; my arm has been driving me nuts. It feels really tight and heavy and is full of parathesia but I can move it and swing it about and use my hand almost as well as I did pre-stroke. No-one would guess there’s anything wrong if I didn’t mention it. But all the more reason to move forward and check out this new therapy!
Have you any experience with a percussion massage gun?
Trace
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I’ve been reading up on Pandiculation and will be giving it a go!
Thank you.
Trace
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Thanks. Encouraging.
Yes, I think there are many who would benefit if you could get your message through. I’ll be chatting with my Neuro therapist about it next time I see her. It’ll be interesting to find out if she’s aware of pandiculation and Rolfing. She’s not mentioned it so maybe not. But I know she’ll be interested in finding out more.
Trace
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No just regular massage guns ; I have 2 , one cordless, 1 a present from my massage partitioner.
If you don’t see me here so much, it’s because I’m starting a YouTube channel about my stroke recovery, it’s called “Start Again”
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCekGYDKocAxZUANcv9P_fYw
Nobody would believe it who has not experienced it: It’s insane the difference from what we feel on the inside to what things look like on the outside ; a completely different story!
Ciao, Roland
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I subscribed to your YT channel a week or so back after watching the video on grounding😁 I confess I’ve not watched anything else yet but will do in time.
I’ve not been on here much, either. Just doing my own thing really.
Trace
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That’s the thing… this is a new one I started the day before yesterday !
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I wondered about that as you didn’t come up in my subscriptions feed when I checked. And that’s because your new channel has a different name😁 I’m subscribed now anyway.
Trace
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Feeling quite low today and not far away from my father in law!
My wife is at her limit of coping and I can’t even imagine myself going back to something near normal life without pain and immobility.
Nothing I planned nor dreamt of can happen now im just managing my weight and getting older waiting for something to take me before I’m 70.
I can’t been be bothered to be my determined self So today I’m feeling pitiful and spent with a wayward son a depressed wife and a dead father in law.
I’m certainly struggling with emotional acceptance of my changed physical state and making it work after four years of living like this with no hint of improvement only smarter ways of doing stufff through adapting my life and sucking up the pain.
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Mark - I am so sorry to hear you feeling low today. It is understandable, especially what you have been through in the last few days.
I can’t think what might cheer you up, but how about a nice drink, be it a glass of wine or a nice cup of tea and maybe some cake or something? Sit down with your wife and just talk to each other - it can be very therapeutic.
What about a nice film to watch and forget about things for a couple of hours? Or is there some favourite piece of music that would cheer you up?
Maybe make yourself a nice cup of horlicks and an early night. Get some rest and wake up refreshed.
As you yourself said, “Lessons learned. Be careful and keep moving even if only a little slower”. Life has its ups and downs - that’s normal.
Wishing you and your wife all the best.
Keep going
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Thanks for the pep talk ManjiB, I’m in a self pity mode what with the death of my in law whom I held in high regard and the lack of any significant spontaneous recovery of my major disabled limbs and the continuing left side pain which over time is wearing me down.
I need to get a grip and focus on the family’s pain not mine,
My wife’s bandwidth to cope is at an all time low and her father’s death has not helped plus her grieving mother and daughter are too much what with my crap on top.
I’m looking forward to seeing my brother in law when he comes over from New Zealand for the funeral, wish that he visiting for any other reason but will take what I can get. Much alcohol will flow when he gets over as we toast his father’slegacy.
I will be more my old self in time but I have deduced that spontaneous recovery is so unique to every person I cannot project my own recovery point anymore than any other persons due to the great unknown in the brain repair process.
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So sorry to hear of your father in law passing, please make sure you’re taking care of yourself during this difficult time.
Anna
Thanks Ana ,
Things will settle down after the funeral in mid march and life can carry on as before.
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Hi Mark - It seems you are pretty much back to your normal self again 
I can imagine it must be difficult to lose someone you loved and had held a high regard for and especially when there are other things going on in your life.
Hopefully your wife will also come to terms with things and perhaps having her brother over will help.
You’re doing all you can to manage and so you should be pleased with yourself and not be so hard on yourself. Think of the happy times and memories of your father-in-law. The way I look it, from what you are saying, he enriched your life and that is something to be thankful for and to celebrate.
Maybe you can call your brother in law on Xoom or Facetime or something and have a chat. It’s not quite the same as in person but it’s close enough
Wishing to all the best.
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Hi Mark @mrfrederickson sorry to hear you’re feeling so low. It is natural to feel a bit low after losing someone you are close too & of course you will be worried for your wife too. Take the time you need to grieve for your father in law. In time you will start to feel a little better again.
In relarion to your recovery you are doing well. You have come a long way since you moved house. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Also, try & find aome acceptance of how things are. Does it matter if you have to so things in a different way. It is still being done. You can not gauge your revovery against another and I find it can be demoralising to do so. There are many different factors in play that affect how we all recover.
Look after yourself & best wishes to you and your family.
Ann x
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Thanks Ann just planning the funeral and getting my mother in law settled to life as a widow.
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Thanks Ann I’ve decided to change my hacksaw blade as the old one was not so willing to cut through the old washing line post of the failed umbrella line set up.
I needed to make it smaller to fit the boot of the car but the old spike was too long hence the hacksaw rose to the occasion and I cut it up while my good lady stabilising the part to be cut. All successful and my right arm held good. Just renewed the blade as the old one had some mileage on it.
Keep on just when you feel useless you can astound yourself.
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Absolutely. Keep trying as you just never know what you can achieve.
I hope the funeral arrangements are going ok & that you ,& your wife are doing ok too.
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