New to all this!

Hi ? folks! I am, a 60 year old female,  reasonable weight,  non smoker.  Was a carer for my sadly now passed husband,  we were married for 30 years and I still feel raw,  8 months on..  Im quite independent because I've had to be,  my husband had many health problems,  he was disabled , and suffered two heart attacks and a stroke( the stroke affected him mentally more than physically,  it was sadder still as he was a Maths teacher,  and couldn't add 2 +2 .. He was lucky in the fact that after a year of rehab, learning to read and write (his speech was ok ?)he recovered enough to go on to a new job which he enjoyed. Sadly though the heart disease 8 months ago took him from me. 

Now,  to myself..  I must admit I've obviously had a lot of stress,  coping with funeral,  family , etc,  everyone has been kind but its taken me this long to feel a bit stronger. .

After a nice afternoon out visiting a friend 3 weeks ago,  I came home (by bus),  enjoyed the day but glad to be going home.  The bus drop off is only literally 5 mins walk to my flat. As I walked along, all of a sudden my left foot  stopped , as if it was in cement!  How I didn't fall flat face down I don't know!  My foot  and hand / arm was tingling with pins and needles. . my foot  felt floppy.. Don't ask me how I got home , was slow and scary, was trying not to panic. Rang 111 at home  who told me to get straight to A and E, I think I was on auto pilot,  got a cab as I didn't have anyone near me with a car ..was in hospital  4 days, they did loads of tests which I was grateful for,  diagnosed a TIA,  Mini stroke,  don't get me wrong I was glad to get out of hospital but  when I got home  it sort of hit me, I felt shocked and emotional. 3 weeks later I feel so tired  and vulnerable going out far.   In hospital and first 2 weeks home I was on aspirin,  then after that , clopidogrel and amlidopine (blood pressure) in mornings,  and statin at night . At this point I have been docs twice as one of the tablets are making me clammy,  and sweaty, almost white hot at times,  which makes me feel faint. . doc yesterday said its elimination process and he's told me not to take the amlidopine for a few days,  too soon  to tell as i only did that from this morning,  but have still had awful time of it this afternoon, only just feeling less sweaty now( 7pm) . Have to go back docs Tues after Easter , to report back. 

Looking at some of your stories,  I see many of you have had probs with the Clopidogrel though,   I asked about that, which is where the elimination comes in I suppose,  i'd much rather take aspirin!  

Sorry for the length of this,  I thank you for reading,  any advice welcome,  I'm quite scared,  and worried  about going out at the mo,  till tablets are sorted,  felt very panicky this afternoon,  went to local shops,  but hallway back, I couldn't  cross  the road, was so clammy and dizzy,  sat for bout 15 mins trying to "feel normal " enough to get home. Like most of you have said its the not knowing whats happening to us and why,   lot of people have assumed mine due to stress,  who knows?  And,  of course,  while I feel thankful it was not far worse,  I'm worrying if I'll feel better , or myself again!  Best wishes and love to all on here,  we all on journeys we didn't ask for,  but its good to share :))x x 



Hi - you sound as though you've had a long list of challenges, and now you're facing this challenge without the support of your husband.  I'm so sad reading your story, but hope that things will settle down for you in terms of meds and stroke recovery.  This may be difficult for you to achieve, but you will need plenty of rest, especially in these early days.  So if you can find ways to conserve your energy, and to allow yourself time to rest, you will feel the benefit in due course.  

You have clearly already dipped into some stories on this site, so you will receive support and encouragement here whenever you need it.  It can be a very scary time, so ask for help from others who have 'been there'.  You should make a good recovery from a TIA, but it's still unknown territory for you, and the fear and emotion are forces to be reckoned with. Be kind and patient to yourself, give your brain time to work things out.  Getting the meds sorted will be a good step in the right direction, you may well find that you won't need much medication in the longer term.  

Keep posting, and let us know how you are, take good care, xx 

Dear Tallulah

So sorry to learn of your huabands passing and then you having a stroke.

Maybe you could try compartmentalizing what has gone on with the stroke. It doesnt greatly matter what went on for those hours around the stroke. Once the doctors find you to be medically fit then everything lies ahead and what lies behind is just for conversation. 

So you have been discharged and I would urge you to keep a copy of your discahrge letter. If this says the magic words "transitional ischemic attack" then please feel ultra relieved. If it is TIA then you will not have an "infarct" so damage to your brain will not be permanent. Most of us are "full stroke" and we all have some pretty horrid outcomes. This will not apply to you. You will recover in weeks or possibly in days. Your recovery will indeed get your previous self back again.

Now the other thing to consider is that your body has given you a warning. To reduce the chances of further strokes you have been prescribed several medications. You need to use the tablets to help you to be fit, eat properly and above all to get rid of the stress.

I found amlopidine an utter disaster that got close to giving me permanent damage. Doctors switched me to Ramipril which is far less intrusive. Now loads of people are OK with amlopidine so its not a magic answer. If your BP edges down then the tablets are working. Clopidogrel thins the blood to reduce further clots. I have no problem with Clopidogrel and I had a ten week test to see if it was causing other problems. It wasnt. If it causes you problems then Dr will probably offer 75mg aspirin in lieu. I dont get along with statins and I took the decision , with my GPs help, to drop them. I was 68 at that time and if I live a few years less then so be it. You are quite a bit younger.

Good diet, sensible exercise, relaxation techniques will work better than the tablets so use all the options.

The stroke has clearly affected you and some specialist counselling would be a good idea. I got this on the NHS and it was a big help. I had PTS and didnt even think about it. 

So take it very easy for a while. You can overcome all the current problems.

Smile. Be positive. Lots of us are here for you

best wishes


To you both with lovely supportive replies! Thank you so much,  I am a normally positive person,  more used to dealing with other people's concerns, physically and mentally,  I also looked after my mum for a couple of years,  felt it was expected of me as am the only girl  of my family , I was working too and had two sons,  obviously my husband was there then, and bless him, was a fantastic help. Of course I was younger then,  had more energy,  less time to dwell on stuff,  like many others , got on with the things we have to do,  it wasn't all bad,  had lots of laughs along the way!  :)

I feel I've lost "myself" quite a bit,  not just with the TIA,  my husbands passing too.  Im determined to get my confidence back,  and glad to say I have a close support network or family and friends. 

At this moment iim having Bereavement counselling through Cruse,  which is helping a lot. 

Will be going back to docs next week,  the elimination game with the tablets,  he's suspecting the Amlodipine causing probs at the mo. 

Happy Easter to you all,  try keep smiling!  X x

Hi Welcome aboard and to the recovery journey.

I am 18 mths post stroke and I too was out shopping when it happened luckily I had someone with me, who I told to ring ambulance as I knew it was serious.  I have been lucky with my recovery, I have back all my mobility, but have stroke fatigue and memory problems when I get tired.  I have been able to return to my post as teaching assistant but only for 10hrs a week I am unable to cope with more and I only work with small groups now as I cannot take the classroom environment.

I join you in being worried about going out on my own,  I won't if I can help it I would rather be at home, where I feel safe.  I tend to go out with my daughter or my husband.  I am able to drive again, but follow a set route to school which is only four miles, if I am not there by 9.30 they will ring my James and he will come out to find me.  This gives me a bit of confidence as if something did happen I can pull over, knowing he will be with me in ten mins or so.

I am on Clopodrile but have to say I have not had any problems with it or any of the other medication, my biggest issue is the weight I have put on since the stroke due to not being able to do as much,  so today my treadmill has arrived!!!   I can't wait to get my son to set it up for me, I know I will have to take it slowly.  But at least it will make me feel better.

I think all us survivors get emotional even years later, and a lot of people find it hard to see that there is anything wrong, as the unseen issues are probably the biggest, fatigue and memory etc etc....  I find coming on this site so helpful as there is plenty to relate too and others who understand what your going through.

Good luck

Onwards and upwards,  Wendy

Awww,  thanks for your reply Wendy,  don't feel so alone when you read that people know what it feels like. . The running thread seems to be nervousness,  I won't bore you with my other "ailments" lol , just to add that two years ago I had bleeds behind my right eye, 2 ops later,  it can still happen , no warning , my right eye  goes black. First time it happened I was driving, I have driven all my life,  my husband didn't drive,  so after a while I sold my car , felt I was a danger to others and myself,  but I really miss it ,  driving.. Id like to return to part time work,  last 3 and half years have been main carer for my late hubby, bless him. 

Its great that you have a back up plan,  sort of forces you to think about these things more doesn't it,  my next of kin now is my son Alex , he lives 20 miles away but has my neighbours numbers and also my brother,  same distance. I was so used to worrying about my husband that it feels odd to me to now try and cover support for myself,  I expect most of us are used to being independent!  And,  yes , I've never felt so tired .. I walk  a lot now,  and ride my bike sometimes,  but must say at this time I feel shaky and nervous around crowds, ie in a town,  though where I live the town is really small,  but then I feel claustrophobic and can't wait to get home ..

Take good care,  and yes , onwards and upwards!  :))))x x x take it gently with your treadmill, x x