Hi Dawn, like you my Mum was 81 when she had a big right side ischaemic stroke in April 2020 - which affected the left side of her body. She was able to be treated with thrombolysis as she got to the hospital within two hours. This broke up the clot and aided her recovery somewhat, although she has been left with a fair amount of weakness.
This was just at the beginning of the first lockdown so we were not allowed to go with her in the ambulance - and couldn’t visit whilst she was in hospital, so I understand how difficult this time is. She was discharged as medically fit after just ten days with no rehab or physio - as all resources had been redirected to Covid. The information we had from the hospital was ‘limited’…but at one point they said it was unlikely they would get her on her feet again.
As you say - the situation feels heartbreaking as there is so little you can do personally for her at this time. The thing that helped me the most was the Stroke Association website and various articles…being able to read up and learn as much as I could…as quickly as I could. It gave me a purpose and I felt I was at least doing my best to prepare for the future help she would need.
She came home with a catheter, very poor swallow function (so food had to be pureed and liquids had to be thickened), barely able to walk and with little mobility in her left arm and hand. Community rehab was delayed by six months because of lockdown, so we were very much left to deal with things on our own.
So the positive for your Mum is that she is receiving the treatment she needs and will hopefully benefit from the rehab she will get. It is very early days and there will be a long road ahead - the phrase ‘a marathon rather than a sprint’ is very appropriate. Also bear in mind that at 80 years of age - there may be other medical issues that could impact her level of recovery. My Mum already had arthritis, osteoporosis and a torn rotator cuff in her right shoulder, so her recovery has been dictated by these conditions as well as the stroke.
We are eighteen months on and Mum is now able to walk around the house unaided (albeit a little unsteady). She has to sleep downstairs - although she is able to climb the stairs every now and then. The catheter is gone and she is able to eat normal food (as long as it is chopped up small), but her appetite has never returned fully - and she has protein supplements to help with this. She is able to speak although her voice is a lot quieter than before. She is able to get into the car so we can take her out, and we have recently been to a local garden centre. She is able to walk round with a rollator and we stopped for a coffee whilst there.
None of this would have seemed remotely possible when Mum first had her stroke. So the key thing is to never give up hope. Yes there will need to be changes and adaptations - life will potentially be very different - but the brain is a wonderful thing and it learns to adapt and change too. So improvement and recovery is always possible.
We provide all of her personal care…her memory has been affected and she has been left with a lot of emotionality, anxiety and post stroke fatigue. So a lot of patience is required. My Sister and I are learning as we go - sometimes we get it right…sometimes we don’t ! It’s a process - a journey we are all on together.
Sorry for the long reply - I wish you and your Mum well and send strength and courage for the future.
Best Wishes
Karen