Fascinating reading about others attitude to being a stroke victim. My emotions were put to the test when I was having the most uncomfortable road journey of my life in an ambulance after my stroke of nine and a half years ago. Uncomfortable because the rail at the bottom of the stretcher was cutting painfully into my bare feet and I had no means of telling anyone. At this time I gave up on life expecting to be on a wheelchair for ever and my mind kept me going by running through my life story. It is interesting to note that at no time did I feel sorry for myself.
Much later that day I found to my delight that I could negotiate myself to the toilet using a walker for support. This gave me a new bearing on life and not being able to sleep spent most of the night working my way through the alphabet to see if I could say out loud any of the letters. The next few days was spent working out what abilities I had left and learning how to make the most of them.
Since those days I’ve overcome a mass of hurdles as will have most of the people reading this letter. I now walk without a stick and can be understood by anyone I try to talk to. Previously I avoided anyone in a wheelchair and also those with obvious handicaps, Nowadays I talk to them all knowing how close I got to being in the same boat.
I find it very difficult to accept my stroke etc. Know am lucky, blah blah blah, but loved able bodied life. Likewise, never really bothered about disabled folk pre collapse. I also talk to those passing me, with a smile and hello! Works wonders! Rock on everyone! Carole xx
Rock On indeed, it’s the same for me now everybody and I do mean everyone are a part of me now. Can’t explain but once Id settled down to rebuilding the new me after Stoke my outlook on life changed for the better. No negative vibes about anyone. Don’t get me wrong I have down days when I need to rant/rave and kick myself in gear and be kind to myself
I have come to realise you really have to try and get the best from the time you are given. There are many things to worry about but mostly we cant solve them, only do our best to improve things.
In 2013 my son was diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma, he was 25, after a year of gruelling treatment things were looking good. In 2014 I was diagnosed with breast cancer and shortly after we found my sons cancer had returned, we went through treatment at the same time. We lost our boy on 12 December 2015. Life has never been the same. Troubled years followed, unable to cope with losing my son and trying to support his brother and sister. through their grief. His father (my ex husband) moved away with a new partner. Covid followed with the uncertainty of lockdown. Just as I thought I was coping with life again I suffered a stroke out of the blue. I have been lucky not to suffer too badly but it has left me tired and depressed. I guess what Im trying to say is seize any joy you can, enjoy the little things with the people you love. Being ill makes you realise we are all vulnerable and some things really dont matter.
I hear you @Rups when you say you feel like yoda, me too!!
Sorry to ramble, I guess you all have stories to tell.
Sending best wishes to everyone… look for the joy in the everyday.
I am so sorry. I cannot imagine the loss of a child at any age. I don’t know why you are still here, I am still here, but we have lost so many others we love and seemingly should have been healthier or expecting much more life time. But I do suspect there is a reason we are still here, and you advice to look for the joy is the best advice there could be. Some days that is harder than others, but it is all that truly matters…at least for me, as I see joy as love. If I have a bout of depression I try for 5 minutes of joy today, maybe 10 tomorrow, adding a little until I start noticing hope again. Even if that little joy is only in finishing a task, or watching the stars, or any simple thing. That where my joy comes from…the small, generally overlooked things. Very nice to meet you. I hope you are feeling better each day.
Carole xx