I'm frightened

Hi, A couple of weeks ago my husband and I went on holiday. We arrived on the Saturday . I had a rotten headache, which is unusual for me, so took a couple of tablets.

I know the following is a bit TMI but, I went to the loo, and couldn’t get off. I really couldn’t move. Apparently my speech was off too.

Anyway my husband and I recognised that it might be stroke so we decided to go home the following day (short holiday)!

Next day I went home and straight to our A&E, after a multitude of tests they said that I hadn’t had a stroke but that I had an infection. They gave me intravenous antibiotics along with a 7 day dose and sent me home.

Next day I went to my GP, who took more bloods and sent me off for a chest x-ray.

Anyway, the next day I was struggling to breath, my husband phoned the GP who told him that he wanted to see me straight away. Got there by which time I was pretty out of it and apparently very sick.

I came around in a high dependency bed with Sepsis. 6 days later I was discharged. Then, last night I received a call from the consultant neurologist who told me that in fact a mistake had been made as the test results clearly suggest that I had a TIA, I’m already on all the medications needed, I’m booked for echo of heart as I have abnormal heart beat, another chest x-ray, and regular infection and inflammatory tests. Meanwhile he wants me to test my BP 4 times a day, and my sugar levels.

I’m fully aware that TIA’s are often a precursor of major strokes. I’ve been told to rest as my body has been through a huge amount , but I’m scared, really scared, I don’t know what to do next.


Trouble is I was already on the meds. So my risk is greater than before.


@Sallybee welcome to the forum although sorry you’ve had cause to join us.

You have been through a difficult time & it all must have been very scary for you.

I think most of us worry about having another stroke but as @Mahoney has said having a TIA doesn’t always mean you will go on to have a stroke. That won’t stop you worrying of course.

Sounds like they are doing tests to try & find the cause which can then be treated. In the meantime follow their advice & rest up. If your BP shoots up then you should seek advice straightaway. I’d also advise speaking to your GP as they can talk through your fears with you.

Sending you my best wishes.

Ann xx


Sallybee-- In my case, after my stroke, they did an echo of my heart and I also wore a heart monitor for a couple of days. It all enabled the cardiologist to pick up that I had afib (atrial fibulation-a type of abnormal heartbeat that is known for being the cause of many strokes.) So, I was put on the proper meds for that condition.(They also helped my blood pressure, which was sort of high–mostly I think because I was such an emotional wreck. I don’t worry anymore, because they found the cause and remedied it. I’m sure over the next days and weeks, they’ll get to the root of it all. Understanding it and treating it will help you feel not as fearful. Also, I saw a counselor for a few weeks to help me work on my anxiety and fear. One of the things I learned was to create a mantra for yourself and repeat it throughout the day and when I felt scared. It helps to reprogram one’s subconscious, which is where many fears simmer–Something like “The cause of my troubles is being treated and I will be all right.” Mine was: “Every day in every way I’m getting better and better”. Also, ask more questions of this group. They are very loving and helpful. You’ll be in my prayers tonight. :heart: :slightly_smiling_face:Jeanne


The neurologist told you there was a mistake? or told you you had also had a TIA? Either way, they are asking for the testing you need for either case. I was asking as I had sepsis and inflammation as well as high blood pressure that led to my embolic strokes and aneurysms, arrhythmia and AtrialFibulation. I am so glad they have kept you in hospital and are still looking at what is going on with you rather than sending you off on your merry way. You will know more after the echo, chest x-ray and bloodtests. I will keep you in my prayers. Relax and rest as much as possible.

1 Like

Please don’t let me frighten you. I am trying to convey that it sounds like they are giving your situation the attention it needs to address it correctly. Keep track of that blood pressure as asked.

Hello @Sallybee
So sorry you’ve had to cause to join us. The silver lining is you found this wonderful bunch of empathetic knowledgeable tolerant supportive folk who are always here and properly understanding in ways that others just can’t including the medical professionals and family members .

This is a great place to express your fears, rant when you need to unburden yourself, celebrate your victories, share your progress, even share your bad jokes! A fear voiced and shared can be slain.

Fear of repetition of nasty things or just the whole general topic of anxiety is a very common one here. Anxiety is preparation for fight or flight which is the hijacking of the conscious processes by the amygdala that prepares the body in times of need.
Unfortunately the fight flight mechanism is a bit messed up after a stroke. Not only do we need that mechanism more but it may be damaged, and emotions of which fear is one are in a jumble following our instantaneous and non-negotiable relocation to an alien landscape

Use the magnifying glass at the top of the pages of the forum to search for anxiety. There are a lot of posts on it. You’ll find some for example started by @Pinch and @Al59 that are very recent and Will show you you’re not alone, have peoples suggestions about what to do to reduce or manage your fears. (To find posts on a topic from a person search “topic @userid” without the double quotes

I endorse all the other suggestions made.
Getting the medical professionals to look for a cause is wise; for example hole in the heart PFO is present in about 25% of the population which may be a big surprise. It’s a common cause, as is AF - but you may not ever get a reason.
Review of your meds dosage will be appropriate. You said you were already on them yet you still had a TIA so there’s opportunity to adjust them to doses or a mix that will address potential in that area.

There are also in person and zoom support groups. Details of these are also in this forum here are some links


Be strong & look forward to it rich and enjoyable life post stroke (/tia)

Caio Simon


I suggest you do nothing.

You are right, you are going through a frightening experience. Actually that is not quite true.
The reality is mind numbing terror.

If there is anything good that can be said about this, it is that it will fade. I’d keep off any extra drugs that offer to numb that fear in the meantime.

As time passes you will begin to realise you are going to survive. The drugs you are being given to treat the stroke are there to prevent any further damage.

Your biggest hurdle will be coming to terms with how stroke has affected your life and the lives of those around you.
Talking to others on this forum will help you deal with the heavy stuff.

I wish you well and assure you, you will find your way.

Keep on keepin’ on
:writing_hand: :smiley: :+1:


The neurologist rang at about 5pm to tell me that a mistake had been made when I first presented at A&E and was told I didn’t have a stroke, but had the infection.

I had in fact had a TIA as well as the infection. The infection was the priority in any case as that was immediately life threatening.

I’m home but on bed rest, I have a murmur, and AF, for which I’m on meds for. I need another scan of my heart, and another chest x-ray. I also have bloods and 24hr ECG. To come.


Hi, anxiety is one of my bedfellows, as is PTSD, and most of the mental health issues known to mankind. I have Bipolar so you name it I’ve done it. I am able to self hypnotise when I need to run away in my mind


@Sallybee I can only offer my sincere sympathies, prayers and good vibes. I would be scared also.
Stay with us on this site and you will get warm and valuable advice. All the best.



We do have similar issues. When I feel like I am having an anxiety attack, it is generally AFib at work. It causes my heart rate to rise. Mostly just laying back in a chair with a cool drink of water and feet up will calm it down. If it would last more than half an hour, or your heartrate it racing (I think the number is over 120), or you would get cold sweats and clammy, it may be time to call for help. This is the only way I can really tell the difference. AFib alone is not generally and emergency, but if it doesn’t subside quickly, it truly needs looked at and definitely your cardiologist needs to be made aware of any events. Keep track of them in a notebook along with your BP and heart rate measurements, with note of time taken. Of course, you could be very different from me, but none of what I have told you is anything that would hurt you in any way.

1 Like

Hi @Sallybee and welcome to the forum. It sounds like you’ve still got a lot going on with yourself while they get to the bottom of as this. While the doctors are only trying to investigate, many tests will be done to rule things in and out. And meanwhile you are left waiting in the dark to up your fears to astronomical proportions and that is not good at all considering you are Bipolar!

…and sometimes they’re not! Mine was a TIA 2½yrs ago, I’m long past the worrying stage, I’m done with worrying! What’s the point? I broke my ankle a couple years ago just calmly walking down the stairs; I wasn’t rushing, I didn’t have my arms full of anything, I was holding the banister but I still broke it. I’m not going to waste the rest of my life worrying about what is out of my control because what’s the point?

Worrying isn’t going to make it better…but it could make your health worse. Your Bipolar so you know what you need to be doing to control that. Are you on any medications for it and if so, can you still take it? Self hypnotise as much as you need to when you’re low like this. And when ever you do have these worries creeping in, get angry with them and tell them to f’off and go do something to distract your thought. I believe using the words F’off is a great form of mental therapy; I used it a lot in the beginning for such negative thoughts, only in my head, and very satisfying it was too :blush:
Maybe also get yourself one of those UV lamps to help with those low moods.


Your answer is so insightful and thoughtful. I wish I had your way with words, and memory. As always, thank you for your reply.

There was a TV sitcom here years ago, called Newhart. The main character was a psychologist. His answer to anything out of sorts was “Just STOP IT”. I thought it was funny and lazy back then, but it makes too much sense to me now, once I decide I can control something. It works beautifully for my tremors. My PT is always laughing with me when it starts and I slap my leg or arm and say that. I also tell myself to ‘walk like a human’ and that humans have been standing erect for many years now…‘stand up straight’. It is so odd how that works, but it helps me tremendously.


Yes I often did that in the beginning with trying to control my arm and foot. I was always telling off one or the other, my family were never just sure who I was cross with or why. They were always sure it wasn’t any of them so left me to it, probably wondering when they’d be needing the men in the white coats to come take me away :rofl:

1 Like

I am still waiting for them to come, but here in the states they just end up putting those with mental issues in jail or in a Walmart parking lot. Although there is a tent city along the river nearby, so maybe I should go pitch one.


No, stay where you are, you’ve got enough health issues with giving yourself chilblains into the bargain :laughing: And I’m sure your family don’t mind, they’re used to it, like mine :crazy_face:

:smiling_imp: They will keep me…I pay the majority of the bills!


Glad the AF meds have it under control. Many years ago I suffered badly from agoraphobia. and bad panic attacks. It got to the point where I couldn’t leave the house but I eventually beat it with a self taught meditation technique pretty similar to your mantra method… When I felt the start of a panic attack I would take deep breaths, close my eyes and imagine I was in a calming place (field/beach/whatever you like) and mentally repeat the words that I chose to control it. The same method can be used to control most phobias. i’m sure these days it’s probably all there on Youtube. Best wishes to you.


Hi Sally, I am often scared too as I think lots of us will be from time to time …in June 2022 all within 4 weeks, I had 10 TIAs and 2 brain bleeds … it is now just over a year later, and had no others since … am I frightened ?? Of course I still get the odd fright when I get an unusual pain or something in my head … I still don’t have a perfect memory and quiz shows on TV now are hopeless cos I can’t speak the answer quick enough … but this group has been wonderful, soo many understanding folk always ready to help and listen … lots of ((((hugs)))) to you x