Hello 👋 looking for advice

My mum had a large bleed on her brain back in October last year. Physically you wouldn’t know, mentally she is really struggling and she now suffers from full blown seizures (which have been under control since November.) Depression is really taking a hold and I can’t get her to take medication for it.
I’ve tried to chase up neuro psych for help. We haven’t heard from her neurologist since she left 1st hospital in November. Chased up drs for help with her eating and constantly feel like I am getting no where!
Can anyone tell me if this is normal? I want to make sure she has the proper support and care and I want to make sure I am doing the best I can for her but I have no idea where to start. She lives with her husband but I work full time and would prefer to able to care more for my mum and the guilt of not being there for her every day is eating away at me.

@Mahoney thank you. I actually made this profile for her hoping she would be able to use it for support. My mum has always been a worrier and always put others before herself, so she still tries to put me before herself. She has started saying she wants to speak to someone that understands what she is going through, is there any online meetings she could try? Xxx

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Hi @Lorna25 - as @Loshy says, there’s the Here For You service, run by the Stroke Association. Your mum could be paired with a trained stroke survivor who would ring her regularly. It was introduced at the beginning of the pandemic and is designed to support people who have recently had a stroke.
I’m a volunteer and the people I’ve supported have had very different needs. Some have been on their own and just need a listening ear, whilst some have been aiming to return to work. Some like to ask questions and others are reassured that what they’re experiencing is perfectly normal.
I think the value of the service is that the volunteer understands what it’s like to survive a stroke, even if their circumstances aren’t exactly the same. I know I’d have benefited from it when I had mine.
Wishing you and your mum all the best.


Thank you :blush: I will say to her, she does need reassurance. That sounds like a brilliant service!

Thank you again xx

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Hi @Lorna25 ,

I concur with advice already given. The Stroke Association has been one of the best helpers for us. GP not so much and they tend to have little to offer and usually end up referring you back to the hospital, or at least that is what happened with us.

Wrt seizures, we had the same and we were told that these are “norm” for stroke survivors. I am pleased your Mum’s seizures are under control.

The same happened with Mum and we were offered some seizure management medicine. It was a huge bottle of liquid and on top of all the medication Mum was on at the time, we felt it might be too much. So we decided not to take it, but either through natural healing or something else the seizures have now more or less stopped (touch wood).

We found that Mum’s sodium level had gone really low and it seems sodium is one of the minerals that transfers messages in the brain (electrolyte or something) and so the low sodium level may have contributed to the seizures. We were advised to add salt to Mum’s diet (I know mostly we are advised to reduce salt) but in our case more salt was needed.

It may be worth getting your Mum’s sodium levels etc. checked. The GP or district nurse can arrange for blood tests.

Also, what you are experiencing is pretty normal or as normal as can be in this type of situation. Don’t worry and don’t feel guilt. Your Mum has help available both from family and community nursing if you don’t already have it. Your GP has to be able to help.

Also, if you have not done so already, it might be worth registering with your GP as a Carer. It seems if you are registered as a carer they can offer help and advice and there may be local carer groups that can help.

Hope your Mum a speedy recovery and wishing you all the best as a carer. Believe me, you are doing a great job even though you may not think it.