I had a stroke which left me with weakness in my right arm and leg preventing me from standing unaided. (I am working on this and hope to make improvements over time.)
When I was on the stroke ward in hospital I asked my physio if it would be practical for me to transfer from bed to wheelchair and back to bed from wheelchair unaided and without the use of a return device. She proceeded to drill me in this very skill. It meant that I could get in and out of bed without needing to find staff to help me and it allowed me to move a little way along the path to independence. Incidentally it also put me in a position where I could get on and off a commode without help.
I was quite proud of my new achievement, and feeling the need asked for such a commode, insisting thhat I was perfectly able to manage the whole process without aid.
I slid from bed onto wheelchair without a hitch and positioned the commode on my strong side. I then successfully moved myself onto the commode. After a short while I realised I was not ready and so decided to transfer back onto my wheelchair, still at my side where I had left it.
Unfortunately as I later realised this was a bad move. I was attempting to transfer to my weak side. As I began the move from the commode my legs crumpled under me dumping me in an ungainly heap on the floor. The young nurse who witnessed this called for help and in a minute I was looking up from the floor at a circle of concerned faces.
A hoist was fetched and I was lifted in a sling and unceremoniously dumped back in bed. After a doctor had looked me and my bruises over he declared me still alive and said that it was likely as I progressed that spills of this sort would probably occur again.
The biggest bruise was to my pride but to be honest it was a small price to pay for a valuable lesson. I now know with the certainty of experience that moving to my strong side is good but anything to my weak side is likely to come unstuck.
Since that time the doctor has been proved right, there have been a few more ‘falls’, but each has been a learning experience.
Let it be known I do not seek out such ‘lessons’ but they have on occasions caught up with me.
I’m sure I’m not the only one to go through this. But if that is you I hope the damage is minimal and the lesson valuable.


@Bobbi I never had a fall in hospital but I did have to be rescued a couple of times when I thought I could go for a short “walk” to talk to the lady in the opposite bed. Resulted in me having to get tablets prescribed for the dizziness & nausea that resulted & having to spend the rest of the day in bed. Not sure I learnt the lesson though :grin: xx

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Evening @Bobbi. Hello👋. Each step we take, whatever it takes, whatever we need to learn and adapt so it works for our circumstances is a step towards a freedom of independence that would never have occurred to us before things changed. But change they have, and our ability to accept and adapt is key and you seem to have gainly taken on already, very early in your stroke journey. It is great to hear a positive attitude, thank you👍 Julia

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My first hours/days in hospital were not so positive.
I was terrified, did not know where I was or why. I was hallucinating and dreaming very strange dreams, unsure what was dream and what ‘reality’. I remember being sure I needed to escape and was certain I was being held against my will. I managed somehow to climb out of bed but was held back by a female nurse I was weak as a kitten and she controlled me easily as I demanded to be released. A couple of security men stood in the background, not needing to do anything. I don’t remember how this resolved but I was back in bed still alternating between dream and hallucination.
My next memories were of that horrible gloopy stuff in water, which was extremely difficult to swallow, then a pureed diet that just went on and on.
With a more normal diet came a more stable me. Then I suddenly projectile vomited, was diagnosed as norovirus and moved to a solitary room in isolation.

Isolation did come to an end, marking an upturn in the events that were making my world. I hope to progress to better things as I sit here at home contemplating my situation.

All I can add is thanks to those in these forums and elsewhere who have spared a moment to encourage, sympathize and lend an ear. I am indebted to you. :kissing_heart:


Thanks Mahoney. I am made of tough stuff. Over my lifetime life has thrown me a few problems to deal with. It has made me who I am. Often sympathy, support, good luck even has been in short supply. Here I am, who I am nevertheless. It is through adversity that we are put in a position where we can perceive that we do not suffer alone. Reaching out to another makes the world, which can be a selfish place, so much better. This is a valuable lesson we do not all learn, but just a few can make a big difference.
My apologies, sometimes I cannot help going out on a philosophical side track.
All the best to you.


Here I am again, thankful as ever, but yearning for more. I’m seven long months along the path from the stroke, the event that changed my life.
I’m still housebound. All the daily help, the physio and so on has departed, long gone now and to be honest, not much missed. Visitors are few and far between. My wife and I are left very much alone together. She soldiers on, to feed me, empty my commode and look after me in so many ways.
I make attempts to cook something in the kitchen, sit and watch television in the evening and sometimes during the day. I take to my bed for an hour, then up and potter, a bit aimlessly, on the laptop.
We just had a supermarket delivery. Amongst all the other stuff she ordered a supermarket takeaway. So we will be having Chinese for our evening meal, something we both enjoy.
Despite the warnings from the physio’s when they used to visit I have been trying to get walking again. I invested in a rollator and can now get to the kitchen and back unaided. I’ve ventured a few steps completely unsupported too. Progress, only minor, but progress nevertheless.
So, I am still housebound but not bed and wheelchair bound as much. I look forward to more progress in the future.
Life does have its ups and downs, occasional black moods swing by, but fighting them off is not impossible. We shall prevail ! !

I wish you all, health and happiness :smiley:

Keep on keepin’ on

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@Bobbi I echo what @Loshy has said. You have come such a long way in 7 months. You should be very proud. Im sure with your determination you will achieve so much more in the next 7 months too.

A big part of the recovery battle is determination & you have it by the bucket load. Just imagine how proud you’ll be when you eventually get a physio & can tell them what you’ve achieved.

Keep up the good work. You’re an inspiration to us all.

Best wishes.

Ann x

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and to

thanks both for those kind comments. You need to know how valued they are, not only to me.
This forum is a great place to say what you need to say and to look for information and encouragement. The two of you and the others here, who offer a kindly ear and gentle support by someone who has been there and knows the territory, makes this the place, this space on the internet, what it is.
I can only repeat, thank you ! !

Keep on keepin’ on :smiley:


@Bobbi thank you too. I enjoy reading your posts & everyone else’s. This forum is great & as you say a safe space to say what you’re feeling & offer advice without judgement.
Everyone’s journey is different but with lots of similarities & I think it’s great we can all encourage each other.
Have a great Tuesday.

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Hi @Bobbi

I echo everything that’s been said you have come so far in 7 months, and I dare say after a year you’ll get even further.

Your posts on the Forum are entertaining and informative and for all you are going through there is never any self pity.

I love your writing style and particularly liked the post about your early life working in a kitchen and would love to hear more stories of that time when you’re up to it.

Keep on keeping on my friend :pray:


I’m close, again, to something that was never a part of my life. A huge wash of emotion filled with sobbing tears. That isn’t in a bad way, it is gratitude from interacting with you guys, you are all awesome (how I hate that word that somehow found its way into our vocabulary). You are all really great, believe me.
. . . and @Loshy I have been struggling with the bread thing. Since summer temperatures dropped, what had been easy on the kitchen top has turned into near impossibility. I am trying to present a method that anyone with a kitchen can perform but now I seem to be only able to make a starter using artificially elevated temperatures. I am working towards some sort of an answer perhaps involving a warm corner of the house, I was a home brewer so have the means to control temperature that is not available in an ordinary domestic kitchen. I have elaborated enough, here is a photo of my experimental starter, just doubled in volume. I will be trying to get something posted about the process so you and others can try it. Not quite ready yet though.
In the meantime thanks for the soup recipe, I’m sure it is delicious, I would have asked Hilary to order courgettes and will make sure there are some with our next shop, thanks @Loshy