Hi everyone,
My dad had Stroke 2 weeks ago, it has caused Cognitive impairment. We found out today is is a multi territory ischaemic stroke secondary to AF.
This is very new to me, my sister’s and my Dad, we don’t know his future.
We have alot of questions
Hello @Janelh67 - Welcome to the community. I am sorry you have had cause to join the community following your Dad having a stroke.
I understand you have a lot of questions - this is good because it suggests you are coming to terms with the situation and looking for answers to help you.
There are lots of different ways in which you can get the answers you seek including from the team who is looking after your Dad, various organisations such as the Citizen’s Advice Bureau (CAB), The Stroke Association and many others. And of course there is this wonderful community of which you are now a member.
Please feel free to ask any questions you may have and rest assured someone will likely come up with an answer for you.
The more detail you provide with the question, the better targeted the response will be.
Wishing you, your sisters and your Dad all the best.
Namaste|
Thank you @ManjiB yes we have alot of questions and hoping to get some answers today, we have a meeting with the OT.
Dad is very mixed up, he gets our names wrong, he is hallucinating, doesn’t really know what’s happening.
It is very hard for the family, but even harder for Dad as his life has been turned upside down.
Hi @Janelh67,
Welcome to the community. I’m sorry for the circumstances that led you here, but we’re glad you found us.
It sounds like the past couple of weeks have been incredibly difficult for you, your sisters, and your dad. A stroke, especially one as complex as a multi-territory ischaemic stroke caused by AF, can leave everyone reeling. It’s completely understandable that you have a lot of questions right now. Below I’ve collated a few places where you might find answers. I hope this helps.
You might find our Stroke Information Pack helpful right now. It’s free to download and includes information on types of stroke, next steps on supporting your dad in the different stages of recovery, including support for yourselves as a family. There’s also more on what recovery can look like after a stroke here: Understanding recovery | Stroke Association.
We also have a dedicated page that might be especially useful to you and your sisters right now: Caring for someone close to you after a stroke | Stroke Association. Even if you’re still figuring out roles or next steps, this page covers:
Our Stroke Support Helpline is also a great option if you’d rather speak to someone directly, our staff are very knowledgeable and also provide emotional support: Do call them at 0303 3033 100 (Monday-Friday, 9am-5pm, Saturday 10am-1pm, Closed on Sundays) or email them at helpline@stroke.org.uk.
When you feel ready, you’re welcome to share more about your dad’s current situation, things like how he’s doing day-to-day or what you’re finding most difficult right now. That helps others in the community share advice, encouragement, or just listen.
I hope the information above helps, and don’t forget to also take care of yourself.
We had our meeting early with the OT, Dad created again early hours so we had to go to the hospital, we have made the decision to put Dad in a care home short term. There was damaged to his cognition before the stroke but he managed to mask it.
So so hard.
@Janelh67 Hi & welcome to the community. So sorry to hear of your dad’s stroke & the issues he is now struggling with. A stroke is a major event which affects not just the patient but their loced ones too. It turns lives upside down in an instant.
This is a great place to offload or ask any questions you may have. It is full of stroke survivors and carers all with lots of lived experience.
It’s good that you have made some decisions regarding your dad’s care & as hard as that is it will give you the space you need to come to terms with what has happened.
In many cases people make good improvement after a stroke. 2 weeks is extremely early in stroke recovery terms & in time your dad will hopefully see some improvement in his cognition. It is natural to want all the answers now but be patient it will all start to work itself out. Stroke recovery is definitely a marathon not a sprint.
Best wishes to you all.
Ann
Sorry to hear what has been going on. Had your Dad agreed for the GP to be asked to refer him for a memory assessment before the stroke? Confusion and memory loss he is experiencing now most likely a consequence of the stroke and its impact.
Is your Dad funding his respite? If he needs financial help, the threshold for local authority assistance is £23250 in disposable assets.
Let me know if I can help. Take care.
@Janelh67 - how are you getting on with planning your Dad’s care?
Did you find a care home for the short-term?
What about the long term?
Hopefully, you are all beginning to come to terms with the situation you find yourselves in.
Please do reach out - there is plenty of help and support available, you just need to ask 
Sorry guys, I had to take some time out it is so overwhelming. We did find dad a care home which was very good and dad settled and actually made plans to stay until a few days ago, plan was he could go home without home care, which I was quite shocked about considering I work in home care as a manager, however, he had improved quite a lot so my sister is and I decided to give it a go, until this morning, once again he wanted to sit in the garden at 5.45am they couldn’t allow it as they have skeleton staff on, understandable, so he went on a hunger, fluid and meds strike, again… and he is hallucinating, again…
While in hospital after the 2nd episode when we found out the extent he had COVID.
He has not had any memory test because before the stroke we thought he was fine…how wrong we were
Oh that all sounds difficult for you @Janelh67 hopefully he’ll start taking taking his food etc again soon.
Maybe they should do a memory test now or at least assess him to try & sort out why his behaviour is like it is. They may then be able to do something to help him.
If you & your sister are not sure about having him home & caring for him, even if the really difficult bit would be short term, then you must let them know that.
Best wishes
Ann
Hello Jane @Janelh67 - No need to apologise. We all need time to take time out, in fact more of us should do it, so well done
Sorry to hear about your Dad not getting the care / support that he would like. It can be tricky, especially if there is a shortage of suitable/qualified resources.
I am unclear on how his care plan was devised or who did the assessment. Maybe I have misunderstood, but it seems odd that someone thought he could go to home without home care.
Perhaps you and your sister should sit down with your consultant/care team and your Dad as he seems to be able to make decisions or at least he is expressing his wishes but not necessarily realising the practicalities of the situation.
Maybe it is time to do a reassessment including getting his memory test.
I hope all gets sorted soon.
Wishing you all the best.
Well Dad went home after 2 weeks and was doing okay, planning on rearranging his furniture etc, once again this was short lived. We have a support planner go in and make sure he was taking his meds and understood what they were for, CHC came out last Friday with his Care Manager and Dad was not in a good place, he has been hallucinating now for a week.
Tonight was quite scary, my sister went to check as she does every night, Dad has taken a disliking to this red recliner chair we got him, he sees it as a person and tonight he has stabbed it with a knife and tried to get it outside, my sister and her husband has put it outside our of the way.
This cognitive impairment he has is something much more than we thought it was.
Hello Jane - I am so sorry this is happening. I can’t even start to think how difficult and distressing it must be for everyone. I hope your Dad is able to get the help he needs to get him through this difficult period.
I hope you, your sister and brother-in-law can stay strong and see your father through this.
Stay strong
@Janelh67 I echo what @ManjiB has said. It must be so difficult for you all. Maybe he needs to be assessed again. The GP might also be able to help but I am not sure.
Sending you lots of strength.
Ann
The bar regarding eligibility for full CHC funding is very high, based on the nature of the person’s health and care needs, their intensity, complexity and unpredictability. If he was found not to be eligible, you should have been told that you can appeal the decision on his behalf. Let me know if you need help to appeal. Regards - David Hearnden.