Dad had a stroke

My dad had a stroke on Thursday night. He was asleep on settee, we woke him up for bed but he seemed unable to wake properly or open his eyes. He had left sided weakness. He was able to talk tho and answer questions. 
the problem now is we were unable to go in the ambulance with him and we can't visit at all. This is so hard as we feel like we can't get a grip of what's happened. We can't see him to don't know what he's like or anything. I want to know about his chance of recovery? Can he get through this? 

Helly. So sorry to hear about your father. I had a stroke 17 month ago and got through it. All of my right side was paralysed, but I was out of hospital after about 6 weeks. I was lucky. I know how scary it is for the family and must be much worse as you can't be with him right now. I would suggest you try and speak to the ward (I'm sure you have) and get a virtual family meeting set up with his consultant. We had a face to face one,but my daughter-in-law dialled in as she was at work. Remember the worst day is the day of the stroke generally. All strokes are different as we are all different. However, communication is important in whatever way it is done - maybe you can get a phone or something to him somehow, if he doesn't have one so that you can communicate that way. That for me was very valuable as I could speak to friends and family. All the very best. He and you will get through this. Jackie

It is a shock when a stroke happens due to its sudden occurance for no apparent reason and your distress especially at this time must be very difficult to manage. Rest assured that your dad is in the best place at the moment in time and he would I am sure have gone through scans and tests the minute he arrived in hospital. This would have been followed by the relevant medication under supervison of a consultant and 24/7 monitoring. The thing your dad will want most is for you to stay strong for him and for yourself you could telephone the Stroke Association who have qualified staff who could help you with ways of coping through this very difficult time.

Stay strong,


Dear Helly

I had a stroke during the night and I didnt wake up until morning. So far, this is similar to Dad. I was 68. Quite fit. Dont smoke and I booze within reasonable limits. I had left sided weakness, post stroke tiredness and small vessel disease.

If he made it to the stroke resus room within four hours of the stroke then they will blast him with something that reduces the impact. I didnt get that because I slept for far too long.

I am now 72 and have lived through the recovery.

The stroke resus was fabulous. I had my own dedicated nurse until I was handed over to the ward sister who took me to the ward. In the ward I was with other stroke survivors. I needed days of quiet to gather myself and thats what I got. Five days of calm and quiet. Physios attended in numbers.

At five days the staff had contacted my wife to check whether my home was suitable. It is, I got given some aids such as walking crutch, perching stool and bath seat. Inside the hospital I had to get my own breakfast, shave and shower. The breakfast was in a dedicated kitchen and the purpose was to see if I could manage. Likewise the shower and shave.

Five days is a much shorter time than most. I did then get six weeks of home care as I was an early discharge. But if dad is in the hospital a bit longer then that will compensate for the lack of home care.

The journey home took a half hour and wasnt bad at all. We went in a taxi.

Of course I wasnt restricted by this horrid corona. My wife sat with me every day, which was nice , but not essential I hated any noise so I had to ask her to read /knit/go for lunch and so on. 

Every stroke is different.

I will be honest with you and say that the first month can be when we dont make it. But reach one month and survival is highly probable.

So yes of course he can recover. This forum is full of people who survived.

Do read the SA leaflets. They are very good. Dad will not have all the symptoms mentioned, but if you have a vague understanding of the symptoms then you wil be prepared.

Recovery is stunningly slow. Mind blowingly slow. But there is recovery.

Best wishes





Helly, You have already received excellent advice. The first hours after a stroke are critical. My stroke was four years ago and I was rushed to hospital on blues and twos. I cannot remember that journey at all or having a scan. I was also on holiday and it was a week before I was brought back to a local hospital.

Like Colin, I had left side weakness and my left arm was useless. Basically, I just lay in bed and felt really 'not with it'. It was a long time before I could even turn over in bed. Much as I was reassured by visits, I did find them quite wearing.  I had a month on a rehab ward with wonderful staff who got me up and walking again. I also had six weeks support at home and adaptations were made so that home was more manageable. Like many survivors I had post stroke fatigue. This has eased but not gone away. I now walk indoors without a stick but always use one outdoors.

Four years on, I now cook most of our meals, make bread pAnd bake cakes. This is good therapy for me. I have also just changed my bed. This takes a real effort, and I am now resting. Dad is in good hands and our NHS is wonderful. When he does get home, encourage him all you can. Determination will see him through this.