Hello, nice to meet you and welcome to the community Sheilz.
I am happy to chat with you on this, but I am not sure what if anything I can offer to someone who has been doing this for 18 years! Perhaps you have stories and experiences you would like to share and I am a good listener 
I guess in the main, I have moved on to take each day is it comes, practicing stoicism and making the most of things as best as we can. The emotions and challenges you describe are therefore things I accept and just move on. Don’t dwell on things, take breaks to give myself “me” time, go for walks (five minute leg stretches) etc.
Practice mindfulness, yoga, Pilates, Tai’chi and Qigong.
I came across this thing called “Empty Chairs” recently and plan to participate in that. I am looing forward to my first session this weeks as it happens.
In case you might want to try it, I wrote about it here …
I guess I am just trying to simplify things.
Namaste|
