Angry and let down

Sorry if this is a bit all over the place. Its my first time on this site. Im 37 yrs old and i had my stroke in 2017. Its hard. I have kept every thing to my self, i dont speek to any one about it at all and i think may be its time to start talking a bit. Even though i havnt got a clue what i want to say other than im so angry. I feel like i was totaly let down by my doctor as i was ill for 2 weeks befor i had my stroke. Sorry if this is really vage like i say i have no clue what im surposed to say.

Welcome Christopher. On this site you can say what you like. You are among friends. You do not say much about your type of stroke or how it has affected you. Many people, however, feel anger afterwards. The temptation is to say ‘why me’ and to rage against how Stroke has altered your life. I am three years post stroke and learnt early on that anger can stop us moving forward. I realised that if I stayed angry I could not move forward. I had to fight to stand at first and then walk. Three years on I am still partly disabled but have some quality of life. However, I am 75 and were I your age I might be very angry indeed. So do not apologise for your anger.

Ask anything you like and say anything you like. We will all do our best to help and support you.

Thank you. I had a blood clot  , sorry im not upto date with the propper termanology. I think that has a lot to do with me just wanting to push it all away, but that doesnt work as i am starting to realise. Its just so hard and i dont always know what to do. ( my name is Ayisha. Must of set it up wrong sorry). 

Welcome.  Everyone on here is somewhere on the stroke journey and all experiences are different.  Feel free to speak about anything that worries you and about the anger and frustration you feel.  I had my stroke in May this year so it is all new to me and I don't speak about it much but I have found this is a great place to ask questions

Dear me that wasnt long ago at all. Hope your recovery is going well. Thank you for replying. 

No it wasn't and I am quite pleased with how it is going so far, counting my blessings, but everyone seems to be very different.  People on here have been very friendly and encouraging if you ask questions so feel free to do, you are amonge friends.


Hi  Welcome aboard, as the others have said any time you want to rant or just need someone to talk too, come on line.  My stroke was also in 2017, and I unlike you had wonderful care, both in the Stroke unit and when I was home.  My doctor is very understanding.  Plus I got a lot from being able to talk to others on this site who know exactly how you are feeling.  The journey as we call it is different for each person, but somehow we still understand.  I all ways say to peoply unless they experience a stroke they cannot possibly know how I am feeling inside.  As stroke in my case does not have much in the way of physical effect, its more inside.  Unless you have had one you cannot understand the way stroke survivors feel.  They look at me and say oh you look well youre over it then!!!   It makes you feel frustrated but I have learnt to deal with it.  After a year off I have returned to my job 10 hours a week which is all I can cope with.  I have a wonderful head teacher.

Have you returned to any work?  As said any time you want to rant come on line.  We understand.  Wendy

Thank you. I like u dont really have any physical affects from my stroke its all what is going on in my head. I went back to work january 2018. I only do 25hrs a week but i do struggle with it. Wile i was off my boss was brilliant and i still got payed but i feel like since iv gone back because i look fine every one thinks im fine when a lot of the time all i want to do is scream. Im in an office with a woman i cant stand. She put the radio on and i cant concentrate she thought it was ok when i was on the sick to ask where her birthday card and money was. I just dont understand some people. So at the min work is dificult.

I do feel better having come on here. Listanign so people who have been there. 

hi, you sound like you have a reasonable boss, so I would have a word about the situation and how you feel, ask that they explain to other workers the issues you have.  I too find it hard to concentrate if there is background noise going on.  Which is why I have an area in the school where I am on my own, but people are about incase I have a problem.  The occupational health team could help you out as well. They can ask that the radio is not on whilst you are in the office and explain why.  I feel your collegues may need to be told the issues that you have been left with following your stroke.  I explained stroke fatigue as being unlike any other tiredness like a wave draining back into the sea taking all your energy with it.  Good luck keep us updated.  Wendy

Thank you for your advice. I will try and take it on borde but i do struggle i feel like its not any ones bussines. I think because im so young to of had the stroke i find it really hard to talk about. I feel like i just want it all to go away and for every one to leave me alone. I dont really even talk to my husband or family about any thing. I am trying though. 

Please don't feel that you are alone in this.  If you need to rant do it on this forum as we all understand.  Yes you are young but a stroke can hit any age, even babies and children, it just isn't out 'there' so people do not realise.  It is hard to talk about and people don't understand, but if you do not let out how you feel it will bring you lower than you are at the moment.  Try to explain to your family, have a stroke coordinator there who can help if you need to.  Keep in touch.  Wendy

Thank you wendy, no one tells you how hard its going to be and because i look fine every one just thinks i am. Thank you for your advice i will take it on borde.



I had a subarachnoid hemorrhage in April, I suppose I'm a bit like you as I'd been at the doctor a few weeks before as I was having increased migraines and while I was there he took my blood pressure which apparently was high but apart from him stating that I don't normally have high blood pressure I was given tablets but no follow-up appointment. I find it really helpful to speak to my husband and family as I was unconscious and don't remember a thing (which I think is probably not a bad thing). Hope you're feeling more positive I found " A letter from my Brain" if you Google it really helpful. Best wishes Katy x

Thanx katy, i will take a look. I am trying to talk to my husband more and my dad is a great help. It sounds silly but i try not to bother my mam with it. She has other things to worrie about.