Anger following my stroke

"Cat ownership could cut the risk of stroke or heart disease by as much one-third. "

Thought you might appreciate this.



Thank you, an interesting article.

Sooty adopted us about 18 months after stroke.

He was good company for Rosemary last year when I was in hospital for open heart surgery. So he is a link to stroke and heart disease.. No matter what, I will do anything to keep him safe and happy.

There is so much more in a cats nature than we appreciate. The first lesson was that when he sat upright he would face the direction he wanted to go. A very simple please open that door. I cant make out why he wants Rose to go to the kitchen to get his supper, but he insists I bring up the rear. He is very good at coraling us along.

He will be happy for either one of us to feed him.

He makes my day, every day.

Best wishes


I am nearly two years post stroke at 45 years old.  Initially, I was 'why me'?, 'It's not fair' and I was angry that my life came to a halt just like that!  The anger has passed, mostly but now I feel extremely sad about it all.  I realised I no longer have dreams or ambition.  I basically face each day and survive it!!  I know lots of people are worse off than me and I am by all accounts very lucky (I don't always feel it).  I can no longer see how my life will play out.  I am now in the process of a phase return to work, which is proving harder than I thought it would be!  I am just sad that I no longer know who I am anymore but I know who I use to be.  I guess this is the same for most of us and I know I just need to get on with it and pull myself together but some days I feel so exhausted from it all.  I am told I am now living with stroke from the medical team but I did not choose to live with stroke and that makes me sad. Thank you for listening to my moaning.

can understand how you feel, everything is different now, all tho it’s still new for me 5 months I can no longer do the things I didn’t before, yes there’s still time but feel that may never happen. 

All my friends still go out amd even recently I should of been away on a stag. Fingers crossed all improves but fully understand what you mean 

Hopefully these feelings will pass, but it is hard to live with your issues at such a young age. I am now 77 and my stroke was five years ago, with a smaller one last year. I regret that my old age has to be a battle, but regret changes nothing. Although it is a struggle to do many things, I get on and what I can, otherwise I might just as well give up. This afternoon, I managed to get a hoover upstairs to vac the bedrooms. Getting the vac upstairs was a struggle, but I did it. Hopefully, I will continue to accept these challenges, but we all remember life before stroke. Please don't give up

I never felt any anger or hurt. I had a relative who had a stroke a few weeks after me but who didn't survive. So I think I was quite grateful that I came through it with just (!!!) the post stroke fatigue and diminished memory. I live on the edge of Dartmoor so am able to walk a bit if I want to. 
I did find that doing crosswords and codeword puzzles help a lot with hand dexterity and with focus/ concentration. 

I never felt any anger or hurt. I had a relative who had a stroke a few weeks after me but who didn't survive. So I think I was quite grateful that I came through it with just (!!!) the post stroke fatigue and diminished memory. I live on the edge of Dartmoor so am able to walk a bit if I want to. 
I did find that doing crosswords and codeword puzzles help a lot with hand dexterity and with focus/ concentration. 

Almost 3 years since my stroke. Have relearned to walk, cycle . Used to be a keen golfer but trying to swing made me feel a bit sea-sick. Used to be a tennis coach, but tried to play recently and found it difficult . Bi- focal glasses didn't help.I have a permanent fuzzy head which I would love to be able to rectify. I have bought an electric bike to help me go uphill.

I get up and do exercise each morning which makes me feel like I have achieved something for the rest of the day!
Perhaps the main idea is to keep on trying. Every day is a challenge but it is what it is!




Hello Ken, nice to hear you are out and about cycling. I too am looking into an electric bike, currently I am cycling with a 1958 Raleigh Cameo step-through that I restored over the winter while soon out of hospital. I had a stroke September 2020. Finding the e-bike market overwhelming, and need something decent, light, that can manage hills and dirt tracks - not a city bike and not a fat bike. I too have a fuzzy head most days, very annoying. I'm not advocating drinking, but I have a jiggle of brandy every night to soothe my head. Also drinking nettle seed tea which I can harvest from the garden, boosts mood and energy which makes the head a little clearer. 

Every day is indeed a challenge, sometimes doable, sometimes not so much. What a bumpy merry-go-round it can be. 

I was not angry after my TIA and endarterectomy to remove the clot from my carotid artery last November.  I have recovered the use of paralysed left wrist and hand, and my pickled brain has almost returned to normal.  The fatigue however is ongoing. This was the third clot I had experienced and I wanted to know what was causing them given the blood thinners I was taking at the time.  They say you should be careful what you wish for, the cause is a rare blood cancer, iron restricted polycythemia Vera.  I have just begun taking a chemo pill in an effort to prevent more clots.  I think one must be grateful for life, I play Petanque (french boules) this is gentle exercise and am about to start aquarobics as dodgy hip prevents much walking.  At the age of 78 I don't think returning to my beloved tennis is possible.  My garden has been my saviour with the need to plant bulbs, prune roses and keep it under control, and above all spend time enjoying it with my family and friends. Set small achievable goals doing things that you enjoy to help recovery is my advice.  

Welcome on board Ken.

My fuzzy head has eased. Just give it time and as you rightly say, keep on trying.

And whenever you can,  give a smile. This will fool your brain in to thinking all is well.


I had a stroke February 2020, in the A&E dept at hospital while there for PE's. The care from people I did not know was exceptional. I could not speak, my eyesight reversed and my heart was fluttering but at no point was I angry. I had a friend who was jealous of all the attention I got in hospital. People tell me you are so lucky. I came out of hospital 2 weeks before lockdown, so no regrets on missing out, as evereyone was stuck at home. My speech and eyesight returned to normal. I am on tablets for the rest of my life and do get fatigued but I am alive. 


I had a stroke in october 2009 whilst on my way to work a ski season in the French Alps.I was not diagnosed until May 2010 after i had returned to UK and my doctoor sent me to a specialist to investigate problems that I had with balance,co-ordination ,clumsiness and spacial awareness.
Reading the posts on here fills me with sadness that others have experienced what I went through post-stroke ,which left me with damaged eyesight,defective balance and poor memory.
Like you I was angry and probably depressed for the first year.
With hindsight I could have benefitted from some counselling.
Having diagnosed me,taken my driving licence away,and put me on blood thinners,the medical system just abandoned me to cope on my own
I have recovered a little,mainly because I have learned to adapt to any disabilities.
Not being allowed to drive has limited the activities that I can access but my older persons travel pass enables me to travel within Greater London,go shopping etc.
My message to others is to make the best of what you have ,rather than dwell on what you have lost.
That anger will pass,you will peacefully accept what has happened.
It wasn't fair but the reality is that you can learn to live with it.
I have re-learned the joy of cooking and gardening and have even been skiing.
Good luck on your journey

I think you have just described a feeling that makes us human.The brain is a strange thing, I doubt very much you had these types of feelings before your stroke.

We are told to Accept they way we are, so we can get on with living, but I prefer Acknowledge they way we are and keep trying, we never have to accept it..

Stay positive, find humour in what you do or can't do, but DON'T give in.

For me ... no anger, no regrets, no shock ... if anything, the first thing I thought was .. that's just blimming typical. Then survival mode kicked in, and I've had it ever since. I frequently get exasperated, I often cuss and curse, I can get peevish, sometimes I look at others indulging in what life has to offer with no signs of physical or mental repercussions, and then I just seem to think ... that's just blimming typical. 

Fact is, life threw me a curveball, and I've had to run with it. There's no dodging it. Sometimes, I feel like a prize fighter taking multiple hits in the ring. And the prize? The prize is another day. 

I can understand the anger that may surface but I find it hard to be angry at something that was not done to me by anything other than my life force going awry in some unexplained way. I even find it difficult to get angry at the GP who misdiagnosed and ignored me over three months despite me going back to her on multiple occassions and stating that I felt the vertigo I supposedly had was related to lack of oxygen or blood to the brain. I don't feel angry at her, I do feel my intelligence was insulted though. That's very different. 

At the end of the day, we are important survivors, and even with our wounds, it is up to us to make sure others who may experience or are to experience the same as we have, get as much support as possible. We are the future stroke survivor's beacons of hope because as much as some of us might be impaired, we are a collective who make up a huge proportion of the population which is still growing. I say, if there is anger, let it burn briefly before extinguishing it. There's far too much anger in the world anyway, we've been wounded, but there are so many ways to heal, not just physically. 

My stroke in early 2010 brought my career to an abrupt end, probably four years earlier than I had anticipated.  At no time did I ask, "Why me?", although on many occasions, when seeing other stroke survivors who have had a worse outcome than I have, I've asked the question, "Why not me?" I suppose I sometimes feel what I can only describe as a sort of 'survivor's guilt' in such situations.  I have found great support in family, friends and my faith, and every day I am so conscious of how much I have to be thankful for! I'm now off for a spin on the e-bike on a beautiful morning! 

You rock.  Thank you for this.  I needed it today

I know I was lucky because my ischemic stroke happened while I was at the GP surgery for something entirely different the next thing I was blue lighted to hospital. April 2017 clot buster drugs saved me from a lot of the problems others endured but I still feel sad because A I couldn't work again (I was due to retire this year)

B I  had to downsize in order to live.

C I no longer have any confidence in myself. Yet I  was so independent and strong

D I  don't know who I am anymore.

E I  want the old me back. 

F I am constantly tired

A very good summing up of the life of a stroke survivor.

I have reduced the tiredness issue by getting consistent nighttime sleep. Maybe the long covid brigade will find some answers for us.

I think I have to avoid mentioning the S word in order to find out who I am. I also think it necessary to  make completely new friends.

regret that the old ne is not coming back.

keep smiling

be positive


Yes you have to stay positive & not get bitter. Easy to say as we all come from different situations & lifestyle's & for some it's going to be tough. But we survived so build from there