Hi Gay, having a stroke is certainly a shock to the system physically and emotionally. I dip in and out of the forum when I’m feeling well enough and my vision is in a cooperative mood! I had a stroke in the occipital lobe nearly 2 years ago, which means that basically my vision and balance were well and truly messed up! No outward appearance of having had a stroke (except looking haggard 
). I was extremely fit and healthy and had good BP…… I had moved back to U.K. after 20 years living on a mountainside in the Pyrenees and everyone was shocked that, even at 82, I had had a stroke. It’s been an interesting, up and down journey learning to live with altered vision, the headaches, fatigue, and more headache etc. And the stroke rather toppled me into awareness that youth was no longer on my side (or in plain language, I’m old), and accepting that has been as much a struggle as the stroke. But thankfully I do have a, sometimes outrageous, sense of humour which helps to keep my feelings in proportion. Life is what it is, and as long as I can laugh I’ll survive the rough days. I think dealing with the stroke is easier for me as an oldie as my future is behind me, and I can accept a reduced role, knowing that now my purpose in life has to be turned inward, but with memories of accomplishments and adventures to keep me going……and I’m lucky to be able to find things to enjoy in my daily life; I appreciate the small things, taken for granted things, in life so much more now. Mind you, I do have to consciously look for them at times, and remind myself that it’s still ok to feel sorry for myself now and then, as long as I can climb out of that little dark hole!
I hope things begin to get easier for you, everyone on the forum know how tough it is, just hang in there, and the 1 step forward and 2 back will change. We’ve often made more progress than we think - others can see it, but as it can be so gradual we’re unaware of it. All the best, Virginia
Hullo Virginia , Thank you for your lovely , thoughtful ,long message . Perhaps because you are further down the long recovery road than I am (9 months for me) you are all together more sanguine and accepting than I am . One step forward and two back is too true and this still upsets me . I am in worse shape now than I was 3 months ago , it seems to me . I had intended to go to the Wigmore Hall next week to hear my best friends grandson giving his debut piano recital in that august venue but know I won’t make it as I can’t make any plans ,not knowing what I’ll feel like from one day to the next and anyway having zero energy in the evening. I had expected to be circulating by this time . Forget it .
I must say the Forum is a great comfort. You are all so helpful and positive . Perhaps I will be like that one day ,but at the moment I just moan and feel sorry for myself . Thank you for being there , and every one else who has sent kind messages
@gay getting out & socialising again after a stroke takes an awful lot of effort & is so difficult. I still miss out on lots but i manage to do some. What i do is pick & choose the important ones, make sure I rest in the run up to it & also for days afterwards. Not ideal but means I can attend an odd event. Sometimes, we also have to do these things & accept that the next few days will be rough ones. Recently I went to my step daughters birthday get together. I only stayed a couple of hours & it was absolutely exhausting (i felt yuck for 3 weeks after) but I felt it important enough to go through it. I have now invested in some loop earplugs to help deal with the sensitive heating I have. They dull noise rather than block it out.
I hope you might feel up to attending the recital. It sounds like it would be amazing.
Sending you lots of love and best wishes.
Ann xx
Thank you Ann for your kind message . I shall give the advice serious consideration but can’t say I’ll follow it .I’ve just realised the solicitor is coming to see me the next day which is not ideal if I’m in a state of collapse . I think on this occasion pleasure will have to be sacrificed to business . Drat !
Gay
Shwmae Virginia,“everyone was shocked that, even at 82, I had had a stroke. It’s been an interesting, up and down journey learning to live with altered vision, the headaches, fatigue, and more headache etc.” - Aye, and at 47, movement, vision and balance has interrupted how I look at the world, but not how others look at me.
Hi poozle,
Thank you for your long detailed answer to my message . I wish I could find humour in my condition , which is nothing like as bad as that of other stroke sufferers . The giddiness and pressure never let up . But I am able to get around my locality , cook and shop for myself and be entirely self sufficient . Also I look after my tiny courtyard which is filled with plants . Just sitting amongst my plants gives huge satisfaction . A glass of red wine , good food , a book that makes me laugh , daily visits to my local cafe and chatting to the other regulars , making myself look good (and receiving compliments) . So , there I am looking at the small things that give me pleasure . Just writing them down reminds me that it is worth struggling . Thank you for prompting me to count my blessings and raising my spirits . I do toy with the idea of taking an anti depressant but still can’t take the step .
Gay