Yes that one comes up quite a bit doesn’t it.
I haven’t previously thought of it but maybe “… and I’ve heard of someone who went to the moon, when are you going?”
3¢
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And I’m sure there are people who know I’ve had a stroke and think I’m normal now. But that’s because I don’t bother to enlighten them of every stage of my progress. Beside they’re soon re-enlightened when my aphasia trips me up 
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I remember a time when my sistet said to me that a guy close to where she lives had a stroke & doesn’t struggle with fatigue so I should be ok too. I just told her that i’m happy he doesn’t suffer but that doesn’t mean I don’t 
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There is no doubt that having a stroke is a game/life changer. My first thought after coming round is that I’m still breathing so the only way up. Some 6 years later I still set myself targets. I am currently working towards doing an unassisted chin up. We go on holiday to Kalkan in Turkey twice a year. The first time was somewhat challenging mentally but now I’m better at planning and coping. I have been left with Aphasia which is frustrating at times but I have learned to cope with that. I am involved with a few stroke related projects which I get a buzz from. I’m lucky enough to have had - and still have - a strong support network. No good looking back ……
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Ohh What are they?
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Hello simon, very interested in what you say about ‘the silver linings’ of stroke being ‘at least equal to the losses and may even surpass them in time.’ Wow, after 3 years i’m just about over my stroke which was without doubt the most horrible thing that ever happened to me on planet Earth. But now that i can walk & talk again, i’m noticing changes in everything i do & think; like daring to believe the fantastic notion that my stroke has actually improved me! That my damaged brain has somehow ‘rewired’ itself with all the benefits of 60 years hindsight & opened thrilling new perspectives on existence. Wow & this is only the beginning!
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Hello Serene One
Can’t really say welcome since you’ve been here since 2021. But great to swap sentiments now you’ve seen something upon which to comment
Others have I’ve said it more eloquently and richly illustrated than I. There was a wonderful post by CholDog sadly removed when he left, There was another by Mahoney also deleted when they left. Multiple people have written books with titles like My Stroke Of Luck by Kirk Douglas and others with similar titles similar.
The events are not something to desire to repeat and the deficits are not welcome But the ganes are definitely welcome. I always had sympathy for others struggles and mistakes and honest endeavours that fell short. Now I have a more visceral empathy.
I also have less tolerance of those who create grief and friction without benefit to any and without appreciation of their impacts on others But rather than rail against them right now consider how to suggest a kinder view.
It took me off one track and gave me a purpose on another track that has greater rewards & lots of other things
Caio
Simon
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Hi Hi Apple I know exactly how you feel as do many other on here i suspect, in some respects i was luck did not get my stroke until I was nearly 80 but like you cannot get past what we my wife and i have lost driving about playing tennis my lovely little gardening business holidays abroad, jumping a train to spend the day at borough market, have pie and mash at the Barrow Boy on London Bridge on the way home, trips to see my daughter in croydon, and my eldest son in southampton all gone in the space of a few minutes, ok i am a stroke survivor but it is breaking my heart to watch my lovely wife deal with it all have now ben diagnosed with level 3 kidniy decease as well so now know my future.
wake in the morning with my guts churning, and do truly now want do die what I have left is not a life but a miserable existence. his a truly awful statement and should not and will not be repeated. many of you here have been truly herioc in you support of me since february and I admire your fortitude and courage in your new life post stroke you are all amazing. i will not post here again.
Love to you all
xxxxx
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I wish you Good luck @wattsy hugs 
- and if you ever want to post or message here again then please do
Caio
Simon
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Thanx for pointing me towards that kirk douglas’ biog, just been reading it, i mean i didn’t even know he’d had a stroke, nor mel torme or burt lancaster either for that matter. Wow, so many folk have had strokes, almost as if its normal! Y’see, even got my sense of humour back!
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I had 2 strokes in 2021. I am 60 & still work full time, but there isn’t a day I don’t think about what happened 3 years ago & what my life would have been if it hadn’t happened.
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Hi I’d just like to thank everyone who has contributed to this thread Thankyou for being so honest and it’s made me realise the feelings I have sometimes are just normal after a life changing stroke . Acceptance is the key I think 
best wishes to you all x
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I have been thinking alot about this recently, just over 3 years now.
Life has changed dramatically from where I saw it going. Dismissed from work, ongoing balance, vision, cognitive difficulties.
Part of my problem currently is I am still comparing what I could do to what I can now.
I have adapted but maybe not fully accepted and the grief for that lost self is, at times, incapacitating.
Will it ever ease?
Reading these posts especially the one from @tony_cave ( thank you) gives me perspective and helps me to look at it logically. I am in some sort of second round of coming to terms with my situation.
The first time I managed to achieve challenging stuff from before I was hugely grateful it was happening at all, in whatever form I managed it. It sowed a seed of hope that with time and effort I could move further towards the capabilities I had.
I have to see that continuing to push within the limits of what I am able is the form of acceptance I need to nurture.
Giving up is not an option.
I am grateful I have made the progress I have, but maybe need to allow myself to admit sadness from time to time. It potentially blurs into self pity, but accepting that and pushing on regardless is another acceptance I need to work on.
As @christine2 has recently posted, “acceptance is key” and finding whatever is necessary to facilitate that, be it adaptation or change in attitude is all part of this challenging post stroke journey.
Thank you to everyone who has contributed to this thread, Julia x
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Hi Julia
It was so uplifting to read your post and to realise that I had in some way helped you to come to terms with what has happened to you and that you are in a frame of mind to move forward.
Acceptance is indeed a key element as you need to accept that you will need to work around some aspects.
I found that doing things in short bursts and taking frequent rest in between allowed me to work around the fatigue that many of us experience.
best wishes
Tony
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Sorry to hear you’re feeling that way. Good luck to you & your wife I really hope you find some joy again xx
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@Al59 similar to me. I was very active before stroke, I retired a bit early 2 years before stroke and had never been so happy. Yes push through but it’s soooo hard to do that, especially with bad fatigue.
18 months on I am Still fighting against accepting the new me, sounds selfish to compare to a bereavement but it is. I miss myself! 
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Hi Simon
Sorry for the delay but I’m being distracted by the temperatures in sunny Kalkan in Turkey. We are out for a month.
I got involved with Dundee University who are running a project which uses text messaging to support individuals to undertake walking as a means of exercise.
I was involved from the start and became a full
Project Team member representing PPI interests.
That led to being involved with a project GCU is running.
I’m enjoying it immensely. Gets what’s left of my grey matter moving again.
K
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