Feeling emotional

Been having a few falls lately but feeling very emotional today. Went away with friends for an overnight on Saturday I managed to pour boiling water over my hand then fell and smacked my face on the ground. I feel I am going backwards instead of forwards.
I had a brain stem stroke in February with literally no lasting symptoms. Aphasia started about 2 weeks later has improved but slips in when I am frustrated or tired. I have had 4 falls since February all resulting in minor injuries. I had m’y bp checked today and bloods taken.
Consultant/stroke team called me can you drive yes short trips can you dress yes I don’t know what more I can do for you. He has referred me to Reach team but will need to wait on that
I feel so lost and teary I should be improving not getting worse
Sorry for babbling on doing this through tears x

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Aww, I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way today :people_hugging: I know what you mean though, life is like wading through molasses as you fight your way back to some semblance of normal. Was your hand badly scalded and how’s your face, hope you are not too badly injured. The shock and stress of that will be what’s triggered your emotions so feel free cry, long and hard if you’re feeling like it. It’s good for you, particularly in this early stage of your recovery, you obviously need it and you will feel better for it. So go right ahead and cry it all out, that releases the endorphins, those feel-good chemicals that help ease both physical and emotional pain, so you body will thank you later for it :wink:

Had a good cry myself a few nights ago. Got so many things going on lately was overwhelmed and couldn’t sleep. My daughter was still up writing so I came down to her and asked if I could have a good cry 'cos I can’t sleep and so I did. And because she’s at that young age that tears trigger her tears so we both had a good cry, then a good laugh and off to bed we went and slept life babies and put everything back into perspective :blush:

Recovery is a slow process, always two steps forward and one step back. Maybe it would be a good idea for you to keep a diary of your progress to keep track, as well as to look back on to see how far you’ve come on days like today. Maybe you were tired/fatigued, over did it a little at the weekend hence the accidents, hence the tearfulness. Take it easy for a few days now and slow down a bit. Your balance is still off so all movements should be slowed down a pace in order to give your brain good reaction time to catch up with you, because that’s what’s making you fall. It’s going to take practice because it’s not what you’re used to from pre-stroke days. Until its better you’re going to have to slow down your motions to prevent your head from spinning so no sudden movements, quick turns, things like that are out for time being. As I’ve said to you before it takes 6mths for the initial fast healing, slows down a bit after that. Keep up the good work it will get better, believe in that.
You take care now :hugs:

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@aodonnell1743 sorry to hear you’re struggling at the minute. It’s good to have a cry sometimes. As @EmeraldEyes has said recovery can be 2 steps forward, 1 back or even 1 forward & 2 back. You need to try & work out what’s causing you to fall. It might be fatigue & you might need to rest more. You really are in the early days yet & symptoms will sneak up on you. For the first 6 months after my stroke I was able to do very little.

I can’t believe what your consultant said. At least you have a referral for the REACH team but like you say it’ll be a wait.

We’re all here to send you some hugs when you’re feeling down.

Take care.

Ann xx

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Everyone sees the outside and thinks I am ok well in my head I am not I have lost confidence I am scared out on my own. I have these falls my sister said I am probably clumsy maybe I am but why wasn’t I clumsy before. I thought I would have been heading back to work last month or at least the end of this month but I can’t care for people when I am like this I am scared to tell my work where I am at in case I lose my job

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It’s ok to feel scared stroke affects you in many ways falling is one of them your stroke affects balance so you not clumsy you have to remember that the Brian and body have had a shock it will take time give the stroke association a call they will help you to talk to your employers all the best.

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Talk to your gp, they’ll can refer you for CBT counselling which could help with your confidence issue. Personally I don’t think anyone is fit for going back to work just 3mths after a stroke no matter how minor it may be. You need at least 6mths!

Most stroke survivors are unsteady on their feet to begin with, unbalanced or with dizziness, it seems to come with the territory and doctors should know this by now :roll_eyes: I too had a few accidents in the early days after my stroke. It nearly 9mths for me get steady again and build my confidence when out and about. So it will come back again, it’s just going to take time. I went out for a walk every single day with my hubby in that first 9mths, after that I could doing it alone no problem. But in the beginning I was walking out into the traffic if it wasn’t for husband to hold me back.

And take @Gillian_21 advice about talking to the stroke association :wink:

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So sorry you are feeling down. Indeed, have similarly had a few falls recently. Have reverted back to using wheelchair. Safer and quicker! For me anyway. Have my down moments too, and hate being disabled but try to suppress those feelings until am alone. Be safe and big love. Carole xx :slight_smile:

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@Spacer

I also try to keep my frustrations in until I am alone, hoping to be less burdensome to my daughter. I am around a lot, as I do not get out of the house except for appointments. Feel free to rant, cry, laugh at the dumb stuff with me. I will likely understand.

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Hi Aodonnell1743-- I also had a brain stem stroke 4 1/2 years ago (ischemic). There has been much, though gradual, improvement since then. But, there have been several times when I think my brain just decides to “take a vacation from struggling so hard to recover”, and it takes a rest. I feel at those times, which can last a few to several days, that I am not getting better, but maybe slipping backward. I have learned to just tell myself to “take it easy, get more rest, and stop stressing, and that I am getting better and stronger all the time even though I don’t see it at the moment”. Eventually, those lulls pass and I “perk up” and move on. I was really down in the dumps when I fell and broke my wrist. But, the wrist healed and so did I. It’s in the past now. Remember–“this, too shall pass”. The body naturally wants to heal and get better–and so it will, in spite of our negative thoughts and feelings. I try to help it along by telling my subsconscious mind–“every day in every way I’m getting better and better”. :slightly_smiling_face: With love, Jeanne

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I came home with literally no symptoms 2 weeks in aphasia started now this falling situation like me people think I should be getting better not worse

I have started so many different jobs today and just finished the first one and I have been up since 9am it’s just not me

Thank you for all your support and advice I will take it on board xx

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DeAnne - big love to you (all). We need to let out how we feel, and stroke doesn’t help as adds to the situation. Peace and good luck. Carole xx :slight_smile:

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@aodonnell1743 …so sorry to hear this. I had a fall about two weeks ago in the kitchen. I was fortunate that I could “roll” into it and not get hurt. But HURT I was; emotionally, thinking oh no this is it. I was making such progress. Like most of us we have good days, just even…moderate days, and some really bad ones. For me a good cry helps and to reach out to others whom you can trust.
All the best and hang in there.

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Just to keep you updated I have an appointment with the Reach team on the 13th June I am at physio tomorrow and reach have said they have to measure me for a stick to use till I see them, this is a bit daunting but I know it’s for my own safety. Reach said there is a possibility I have had another stroke and that is why I have started falling and feeling unsure about money etc. Hopefully today there will be no tears. X

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No, it’s not daunting, it’s a '…common hiking accessory that functions to assist walkers with their rhythm, to provide stability, and reduce strain on joints on rough terrain… Its just a safety measure used by most hikers only they call them trekking poles or hiking sticks. I have two but only use one.

Ok, so you’ll be using a walk “stick” but it’s the same thing and serves the exact same purpose. They are a god send and you’ll soon get used to it, it will raise your confidence and get you walking more. It’s a tool to get you what you want and where you need to go :grin: You never look a gift horse in the mouth :wink: Good luck :smile:

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@aodonnell1743 i really hope you haven’t had another stroke. Hope you’re being checked over for this.

I was reluctant to use walking aids too but i use a stick (or my golfing umbrella) when i go out now. It really helps with my balance (i get dizzy a lot). It doesn’t bother me now. I guess it is about accepting you need a bit of help for now & its much better than a nasty fall.

Good luck with your physio & reach appointment xxx

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Sorry about your problems. I have numerous falls,some resulting in hospital trips,some serious some not as bad but my stroke was 3years ago and my balance isn’t so good,i have improved in other areas but not others,i don’t worry too much now i just laugh if i can and tell everyone i’m practising to be a stunt woman.i find using a stick helps,i stil fall sometimes but not as much as i would without it…
Can you have a checkup at GP i know theres not much they can do for us survivors but at least it would be noted on your records??
Its early days still too so give it time and don’t try to do too much too soon.i hope you improve and send my best wishes.Bernadette x

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A WEE UPDATE

. I have attended REACH they have told me my balance is way off. I have a stick temporarily. When I move my head my eyes are following at a slower pace this is what’s causing me to fall. When she told me there was a real problem I had a good cry. I have vestibular exercises to do to strengthen my eye movements.

I have also seen the psychologist who said I have had another bad experience with the hospital regards support and have a lot going on as my friend is dying and only has 2/3 months left. She is going to work with me.

Thank you for all your support xx

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@aodonnell1743 really sorry to hear about your friend.

Good that you know whats causing your balance issues. Hopefully the Vestibular exercises will help. When i did mine they initially made me more dizzy but i was told that’s what it’s meant to do :smiley:

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I am sending prayers for your friend and for you. I hope your friend is able to come to peaceful terms with the situation, or by some miracle is healed. I can’t hug either of you and I have no helpful words, but I do feel for you both in my heart.

I am also in vestibular training but have missed 2 of 4 appointments so far because my insurance rides are not showing up. This is my last hope for standing upright and possibly driving again one day. So far, I get pretty messed up in the head afterward for a couple of days but am able to balance on one foot a little better. I will be watching to see how it is going for you. I hope you will soon be able to walk across a room balancing a book on your head.

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A straight line without falling over will do me just fine so I can get back to work.

Sorry you are suffering too. Sending love and hugs x

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