Firstly I am so sorry that Ann @Mrs5K and Lorriane @EmeraldEyes had such a terrible time with the emotional liability. Crying for so long must be quite draining.
Can I check to see if it is known whether these are tears of joy or tears of sorrow? Do we know?
I ask because we were told when first discharged from hospital following the stroke that random tears or laughter may happen, and it is not known why. Indeed, whilst in hospital we witnessed some of the other patients who experienced this emotional liability, but to-date Mum has never cried. We have seen her laugh, but I wouldn’t say this was random or uncontrolled, more sharing a joke. I am wondering if this is now a phase to come for Mum as she did have a slow start to her recovery.
As an aside, one of the patients was an aunt of the then Manchester United, now playing for Everton footballer Ashley Young and she would often burst into tears. Not sure if they were joy or sorrow. Ashley did not visit
I’m not sure why but my tears were certainly sad ones at the time. There was certainly no immediate reason for them so I’m just putting them down to the bereavements last year and maybe the after effect of my chest infection, maybe I was a little more run down than I realised.
Immediately after my stroke though, as I’ve said before, my emotions were stuck in neutral and I often had fake them where expected. But then I would also burst out laughing at the stupidest of things, fortunately never inappropriately, I think that was more luck that I didn’t And yes, I did cry many many happy tears. And I now still have tendency to laugh too hard. So emotions are coming back, a bit like a baby learning to walk. Actually very much like a baby when I come to think about it. Oh now you’ve got me thinking @ManjiB and I’m always relating back to baby development in stroke rehabilitation. That’s going to another all night discussion with my daughter
My husband doesn’t cry for long but when he cries it is real shuddering, choking, crying and hard to deal with. It is mainly about how he feels useless, can’t do anything without help, how it’s not fair on me and how he wishes he could just end it all.
His stroke was in November and I wrongly assumed he would cry less when he came home, but it’s actually worse. I just hold him and talk to him but he never sounds very convinced when I reassure him.
I remember sitting on the stroke ward the day after my diagnosis & I just suddenly burst into floods of tears. They came from nowhere & I honestly think they had no feelings attached to them at all.
The crying I had this week was extremely disproportionate to anything thatvhad happened (even though it had been a difficult week) & if you had seen me you’d have thought I’d have lost a loved one. I can’t say they came with any emotion - if anything maybe frustration.
In your mum’s case it may be that she never has this issue. Like all stroke things some get & some don’t. Fingers crossed your mum doesn’t. It certainly was exhausting & I am still suffering that exhaustion today.
That’s how I was on Thursday & my hubby didn’t know what to do.
I imagine your husband has some emotional lability & that’s why it is so accentuated. He is still very early in his recovery & hopefully it will ease for him.
I wonder if he cries more at home because it reminds him of lots of happy times & perhaps makes him think about what he has lost. They say we have to grieve for our old selves before we can reach that acceptance stage & then start to move forward.
I found that life is definitely different, I miss some of my old life but I have now found contentment in my new life even with my ongoing deficits. I hope your husband can get to that stage too. It takes time though.
@Trisha2 don’t forget to give yourself a hug when you’re comforting your husband. It’s so upsetting to see their distress we tend to give 110% of ourselves which is completely natural but I found that I was burning out dealing with everything and it was my son who had to force me to take care of myself too.
My husband’s tears began when he was readmitted to hospital following the stroke meds causing liver issues. He would call me but be unable to speak which was very scary the first time but I soon got used to it and reassured him I was getting dressed etc ready to visit…I spent ten hours a day with him, the nurses just had no time to reassure him.
Ann, I’m so sorry you are going through this. I see from others it is quite common, I’m only 7 months post stroke and I thought it would have passed it’s diminishing but still bubbles under the surface I can’t even identify what I’m crying for it’s a very odd emotion I find as I hardly ever cried prior stroke
It is definitely an odd emotion isn’t it. I can’t identify what i am crying for either. It generally appears out of nowhere. Hopefully with a bit more time yours will diminish further. Mine did but still does bubble up to the surface occasionally.
Thats really great advice. It is so important for you to take time for yourselves too. It is usually OK to leave them alone for a little while or to let someone else help out too. I know we are all affected to different levels but after the initial settling in period at home I used to encourage my hubby to go out for a bit not just to give him respite but also because I needed time to myself too.
I have great admiration for all those carers out there. I take my hat off to you all. You deserve more than a medal.
Hi Ann. The University of East Anglia (UEA) has just started a trial for post-stroke over-emotionalism. This is the condition that you describe, but can also mean uncontrolled laughing. I wasn’t aware that it affects around 1 in 6 people who’ve had a stroke. The UEA trial will use Sertraline - a selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitor (SSRI). They will not be testing for variants of the enzyme that metabolises SSRIs (and other medication); I won’t go into that here.
We tend to feel isolated after a stroke, but our experiences can be really helpful to universities, and you get to chat online to other stroke-lived experience people.
That’s exactly how I feel, I keep trying to do more things for myself, but the fact I’m unable to go anywhere independently makes me cross, angry and depressed. It feels like I’ve died but am still here. Rely on my adult son as husband is too feeble to help. 8 months after stroke aged 78.
I’m 18 months since my TIA stroke, mechanical thrombectomy, rehabilitation and all that. I, and all that knew me would never have thought…………
But here I am, 18 months on and I have been fighting, (with myself), pushing harder than I’ve ever pushed, all
In the name of “keeping it together”.
I feel like I am on one constant emotional rollercoaster ride. It really is peaks and troughs all day/night long.
My emotions have become a daily management and control process. My emotional threshold feels off the grid but a good cry every now and then helps. As you say, it’s good for the soul.
You have give me some encouragement that it will
or may calm down, even if I do have a serious emotional liability session at some point.
Never thought fatigue could have such an impact but it’s something I need to think about and consider.
I just wanted to welcome you to the community, I’m sorry to hear about your TIA.
I noticed you have mentioned in your post about fatigue, this is something that a lot of stroke survivors struggle with, we do have some information on our webpage about it which you may find helpful.
I’m pleased that this post has given you some encouragement that your emotional lability may calm in time. You can also find some more information about emotions after a TIA/stroke on our webpage too.
If you need anything whilst you’re using the Online Community, please don’t hesitate to tag me using the @ symbol and my username.
I had an ischemic stroke just over 5 years ago and suffered quite bad emotional lability. It could be set off by something sad on the tv or an act of friendship or kindness. Now nobodylikes to see an old man crying uncontrollably so i started to withdraw from socialising or, indeed, any form of company. Anyway, a quick telephone chat with my doctor and he prescribed 2 x 20mg of fluoxotine daily. What a difference!! Literally the waterworks turned off overnight! I can still feel emotion, both hapiness and sadness, but its very much under control.
Hi Justin, just wanted to welcome you to the forum Facial expression as well as emotion were both set to neutral at the start of my stroke recovery, in other words I had the perfect poker face for pranking But that has all been firing itself up again, becoming unlocked, this past year or so. And I’m 4yrs post stroke now.
So there is still plenty of time for your emotions to settle back down to somewhere near normal again. Stroke recovery is like the slow boat China, so hang in there, there’s still lots of room for improvement
@JustinH Hi & welcome. Stroke recovery is very much an emotional roller coaster…one that I wish I could get off from time to time.
There is every hope for your emotions to settle. I suspect they will rear up occasionally though as I found out last week. This week has been better for me. My emotions feel like they are much more on an even keel.
Fatigue can play a big role in your recovery & also bring on the emotional lability. Fatigue isn’t just extreme tiredness it can have many other symptoms too.
And yes, I did cry many many happy tears. And I now still have tendency to laugh too hard. So emotions are coming back, a bit like a baby learning to walk. Actually very much like a baby when I come to think about it. Oh now you’ve got me thinking 
Facial expression as well as emotion were both set to neutral at the start of my stroke recovery, in other words I had the perfect poker face for pranking 
But that has all been firing itself up again, becoming unlocked, this past year or so. And I’m 4yrs post stroke now.