Dont know what to do!

My lovely mum had a stroke 4 months ago. She is recovering slowly and doing such a great job, however she is unable to see her progress. At present she is experiencing an awful bout of fatigue and anxiety. We attend the doctors at least once a week as she thinks she is poorly, where as she is all anxious when  the fatigue kicks in and has been told it's all normal.

Today we went for a small walk for some fresh air and it was too much for her, however much she enjoyed it

She hasnt known what to do with herself,all she wants to do is lay down and rest in quietness. I have said she must do what her body is telling her as its healing. She has become very anxious and needs continuous reminding that she is ok, and doing great. I wish I could do more for her to help but I am stuck as to what helps, I am on this rollercoaster with her and will do what I can to make her as close to her old self.

Some advice would be great.

Zoe, Mum is in the very early stage of recovery. This is a time when most of us experience anxiety, mostly fear of another stroke or worse. These fears will subside. The fact that Mum is four months on is a good sign. Even better, she has had a little walk.

Post stroke fatigue is common and a real bugbear. Mine hit me on my first day home and at first I had to sleep for several hours a day. I still have fatigue, but after an hour in bed at midday, I can cope.

It is important for Mum not to overdo things, but not to do nothing. I am four years post stroke and can cook, bake and do three or four simple household tasks. If I try to do too much, I feel stressed and exhausted. It will help Mum to split tasks down into stages and rest in between each stage.

I also believe in exercise. From simple exercises and very short little walks, I have built myself up to three hour long exercise classes a week. Yoga and relaxation classes also help. I am still partly disabled, but work at improvement every day.

It also helps to laugh at yourself and definitely do not live in the past. Remind Mum to be the person she is now and to build on that. None of us can be the people we were before our strokes. I cannot go on long holidays any more, for example, but I do still enjoy short breaks.

Finally, welcome to our forum. You are now among friends. Feel free to ask us anything or just use the forum to let off steam. Please wish Mum all the best.

Thank you very much for your advice. 

This whole stroke thing is life changing, more than what I expected.... maybe head in the clouds it will never happen to us, but it has and i just want to do everything i can for her. 

Thanks again.

Zoe, you are being a wonderful daughter.

Your mum will start to get better, just keep being there for her.