Confused

I am so pleased to have found this forum.

I am confused because I do not know why I had two strokes and ended up in Addenbrookes hospital in Cambridge without any knowledge of how I got there or why.
Then, the second reason I am confused what caused my stroke - apparently I had two….!!

As a teacher, well I was…. I know that every day was stressful, and as a department leader preparing lessons for everyone, and marking, and organising everyone… as well as other leadership responsibilities…. I was used to being organised and completing tasks to a deadline.
However, it was the news of my partners mum dying at Christmas and his demise that tipped me over the edge… but why would that cause a stroke ( apparently I had two) , I do not know.

I am now someone who can rarely get out of bed and have constant headaches and just feel an echo of myself.
My partner is fed up and is planning on leaving me… I have to sell the house and think of finding somewhere else to live… and you know… I just am at a point where I am walking in circles.
So, first thing is, find make a plan… but I do not know where to start ! I used to be so organised !!
Has anyone got any tips for me please?

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Hi @Tanya0211 Welcome to the forum. Sorry you’ve had cause to join us but it’s a friendly place to be.

I assume from what you’ve said that you don’t yet know the cause of your stroke. Sometimes they never find a cause but hopefully you ate getting all the tests to rule things in / out. Stress can be a cause but not necessarily so.

It’s early days for you yet so what you describe is probably to be expected. In time I wpuld hope things will improve. It often takes lobger than you expect.

For now take tye time to absorb what has happened & concentrate on yourself.

Have you anyone that can help with the partner / house issue? I don’t know your situation but maybe you could delay sorting the house until you are better able to deal with it. Citizens Advice may be a good place to try for help. Also ring the Stroke Assistance Helpline. They can offer advice too.

Sending you my very best wishes.

Ann x

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Dear Tanya, Thanks for sharing your story. I can find similarities with some of my previous encounters with stroke survivors. I would suggest discuss with your doctors if pain killers will help, also check your BP, in most cases with time it gets better, but vestibular rehab can work- again these are suggestions only. Every case is different. The cause of stroke can be difficult to predict at times, however, I guess focusing on recovery may be a way to shift focus (if you are able). Please assure your partner by explaining that it is likely to get better, and try to do small houseworks (may be washing up a plate for 1 min, but all adds up). I hope that this helps, I am going to be away for next few weeks, but I am hoping that when I am back there will be some good news from you. Wishing you all the best. Kind regards Kusal, Stroke OT

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Hi Tanya. So sorry to hear your problems. Just wondered if you are getting physio now you are out of hospital? I’m only around 45 miles from you but I have been lucky enough to have had 10 months of physio from the Commonwealth Physio team who are based at QE hospital.
The issue with your partner and having to sell the house sounds a nightmare situation and I hope you have friends/ family to help you. If you’re not getting physio ask your GP for help as it’s very important to try and get moving again. Good luck and keep in touch

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Hi Tanya.
Welcome to the group. Sorry to hear about your situation. You’re not alone.

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Thank you for telling me about the fatigue ! As a teacher, or former tea her I am used to motoring 24/7, and 7 days a week! And losing my ability to just get up and showered is debilitating! So, thank you. Ido feel reassured now.
It is great to be part of a community who knows.
I appreciate it.

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Thank you - I appreciated your reply.

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Thank you Anne. I have to say one of my main concerns is memory! I only happened upon this form again recently as I was concerned and looking for help. So I was not ignoring you… I just forgot :crazy_face:.
Any tips would be gratefully .

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Thank you…. It was a good think to hear x

Thank you for the tip of keep moving, Thankfully I am mobile, but I probably need to be more disciplined in getting out …I am just tired all the time so I have just stayed inside.
But thank you… you have given me the impetus to have a walk every day now :blush:

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Thank you for you reply. Sorry I am late in replying!!! I forgot I joined! I am assuming that is part of the symptoms of a stroke survivor…… I used to be so sharp and remember everything…. So it makes me feel worse knowing I forget things.

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Thank you x to me that all made sense, even though I have read it before and forgotten that I had. I find that is the frustrating part of the stroke…

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I am very good at telling other prople what they should be doing but not so good at practicing what I preach! Good luck

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I find i forget loads now particularly if i don’t do something immediately I think of it. Post it notes & calendar reminders have become a big part of my life :grin:

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My stroke took my ability to write.
I’ve been reticent to teach myself to write left-handed as that will reinforce the learnt non-use that is an enemy I fight everyday

As for lists; I don’t really use them because i don’t read them well I make a few but I still don’t read them !!

I do however try and put all appointments in the diary with about three reminders and the salient facts like where to go at what time and always notes about what I want to cover.

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I write everything down and then get my husband to look over what I’ve written. He then writes down any saliant points in a diary. I knew I was in trouble with my memory when I plucked up courage to get myself a take away hot drink from Costa and then couldn’t remember the word for Latte. You’ve got to laugh really, although at the time I was mortified. Did get my drink though, thank goodness for pictures.

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Hello and welcome @clibbers1
2,000 posts read I guess you pretty much know the ropes here so I won’t repeat them .

Yes if you’ve got an incentive that you break down into the abilities that you need to fulfil it and then construct activities around each of those individual abilities and how to integrate them then you’ve got a powerful mechanism for directing your recovery activities .

Writing stuff down when it works for you is great too :slight_smile: I hope you enjoyed your latte !

I wish you the best of luck with them and would very much like to hear of your progress as you make it

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Hi @clibbers1 just wanted to say hi & welcome to the forum. Glad you got your latte x

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