Her daughter turned up with presents a few days before. She gave my wife a tiny cactus, a food voucher for thirty quid and a birthday card. This is either her first or second visit this year. She went on to say the house looked drab and noted there were spillages on the oven top in the kitchen. The daughter is always very busy, works and goes on expensive holidays but never has time for her mother.
I’d like to point out that her mother works as an unpaid full time carer for me and has been doing so without a break for four years. She has had none of those breaks her daughter manages to squeeze in four times or more each year.
We have been summoned to the daughter’s home on Christmas day and I’m not looking forward to being told how poorly she thinks of us, our life and home. She and her husband adopting their superior attitude won’t be the highlight of what promises to be a very empty day.
We’ll somehow get through that in the same way we do when dealing with the after effects of my stroke.
Despite all this we have one another and somehow manage to cope. I try not to be a burden and although we have our ups and downs we get along pretty well.
I am very grateful to Hilary for being there. She helps me through the day, every day.
We will soon be in our eighties and life in general can be a challenge but having one another has got us this far and will, I hope, continue to carry us on.
There will be joy this year and I hope you will get a fair share of it.
Oh I love it when other people have an opinion on othwr people’s houses etc. Shame it doesn’t usually follow with an offer to help out. Just remember it is your house and if you are happy then that’s all that matters. I used to get upset if my house wasn’t as tidy as I’d like it to be then I had a stroke and realised if didn’t matter in the slightest.
Christmas day is just one day and can be aby day you want it to be. Get through the day as best you can and then have your own celebration when it suits you.
She should see my house. That would bring on the vapours! I don’t have any help, so I don’t get time to do anything other than a quick run around with the hoover.
Sainsbury’s is supplying my Christmas food. I’ll be sitting in front of the TV with lots of goodies and having a splendid time!
Happy birthday to @HHilary For some reason, the sketch below reminds me of how others sometimes feel fulfilled comparing themselves to other people. We are at heart the same different people. I’ll be spending Christmas Day lunch with my eldest son, down the pub for a meal of faggots, chips and mushy peas. Then the youngest is coming over to unwrap his presents from me and I’ll spend that evening setting up his new computer bought for secondary school. I’ve never really been a Christmas person, not a humbug, but my father stopped celebrating it when I was about ten, that was the last year we had a Christmas tree. I stopped even getting the date of Christmas right and had to check on the calendar
@Bobbi my family moaned about the dust in my house. I had one reply to them, see the door you entered by, please go back through it now, come back when you can be nice. 2 weeks later my brother came back apologised, and cleaned my house with me, then witnessed how tough it was for me. He spoke with the rest of my family who apologised. we still enjoy our Christmas at home, just the 2 of us, with no pressure especially with me still having dribbles from my mouth when eating
The things one doesn’t usually talk about.
I suffer from hole in lip syndrome allowing whatever I am eating to migrate down my front.
My wife is patient with me.
I’ve taken to wearing an apron at mealtimes.
I now have a tidier front but the holy lip continues as ever.
You did well to resolve that difficulty. These things can fester on forever.
Damn, why didn’t you show her where the cleaning things were, you know you should never look a gift horse in the mouth Don’t forget to return the compliment on Christmas day
Sadly there are many who have that one side of the family, the Mrs Bucket, you’re obliged to attend their royal invite for Christmas. Thankfully we don’t have that anymore. But when it’s your daughter, that must sting
The best thing to do is say nothing, enjoy the food you haven’t had to cook, then go home and look forward to celebrating your own Christmas on Boxing day. Your daughter may still grow out of it, it just takes time and a few of life’s knocks for reality to hit. I take it she doesn’t have any kids, that would soon cure her
I say “take us as you find us” you do as much as you can and as long as you’re both comfortable and happy well’ that’s all that matters. You don’t really need too worry to much as she is your daughter and I am sure she knows it’s not easy for you. My daughter would always come home and just start tidying up! Well it’s one less thing for me to do! After my husband TIA and my chronic pain following back surgery I just do one room a day. More importantly is your health. Have a lovely day
I did tell her that she could clean the stove for me, her answer was ‘I work’ My thought was not all the time you don’t but I didn’t say. She’s a strange kid, takes after her dad in many ways She has 2 kids and 3 grandkids too.
For some reason, the sketch below reminds me of how others sometimes feel fulfilled comparing themselves to other people. We are at heart the same different people. I’ll be spending Christmas Day lunch with my eldest son, down the pub for a meal of faggots, chips and mushy peas. Then the youngest is coming over to unwrap his presents from me and I’ll spend that evening setting up his new computer bought for secondary school. I’ve never really been a Christmas person, not a humbug, but my father stopped celebrating it when I was about ten, that was the last year we had a Christmas tree. I stopped even getting the date of Christmas right and had to check on the calendar 
Don’t forget to return the compliment on Christmas day 
After my husband TIA and my chronic pain following back surgery I just do one room a day. More importantly is your health. Have a lovely day 
